Death is What Happens to You While You Have Plans
by poisonanon
Summary: Maybe it had been best that world looked upon the Kira Case and saw only triumph, the death of the greatest mass murderer in history, the years when Justice had been tested and prevailed. Maybe it's best they didn't know a family died for it to happen.
1. The Shoes to My Socks

I'll start with a shoe.

Mostly because shoes are pretty meaningless, as far as shoes go. Honestly, I could never understand why people got so hampered up over something like shoes. They stay out of your normal sight vision about 80% of the time and no one really gives a shit if your shoes looked like you just stole them from the ass end of a garbage truck. They're shoes, and they were invented so are feet wouldn't get dirty, but it's all pretty redundant since shoes make our feet stink anyway. But whatever. This is a story, and I'll start it anyway I want it to. Not my story, that's later. It's just a story.

So, anyway, with the shoe thing, shoes are pretty unimportant. They never really mattered and I don't think they ever will matter. If things came down to like and death situation, I can almost guarantee you that shoes will be the last thing on your mind. If someone was holding a gun to your face and threatening to blow you away, I can imagine you'll be thinking about your loved ones and the life you wanted to have and how you're going to get out of that dilemma, not about what kind of shoes the asshole that is threatening you is wearing. I'm digressing, but I'll get to my point. You see, most people go through their whole lives feeling like shoes. How they're never going to get anywhere in life, how nobody cares about them, and how they don't make any difference in the world. In fact, lots of people kill themselves for those very reasons, and it's all very sad and tragic, but somehow the rest of us learn how to move on. Except for certain people that I will not mention at this moment who obsess over all the horrible things that happened to them until they basically snap and decided they were going to go on a pointless killing spree, but whatever. We're not talking about him. We're talking about shoes.

Moving on.

Although shoes are still pretty meaningless in life, like some people who feel the same way as shoes feel, they still carry a small basic function. To do what they were meant to do. And although I am only twenty one years old and have had no real life experience besides dealing with the insane people that I have to deal with, I have concluded that the meaning of life is to live. Not very philosophical, but I imagine that is the basic fundamental about it all. So, if anyone is listening to me, I have this last thing to say.

If you feel meaningless, worthless, and nobody cares about you and you have no impact on the world whatsoever, that's okay. Everyone else is too. For all I know, there can be someone a million miles away getting brutally mutilated and watching their family being killed before their very eyes, and I could care less. It's the way the world is, sadly enough, and not even some childish prick with a god complex can make us change the way human nature operates. And we are selfish, cruel bastards. Nobody cares about what happens to that poor soul a million miles away, and nobody cares about me.

And that, unfortunately, is life.

Anyway, I think I've had you all waiting long enough, so I'll be getting on with the story now. My story.

See that beautiful girl over there? The one with the curly black hair, the big brown doe eyes? The one with the light blue dress hanging off her perfectly shaped body?

Yeah, that's not me.

That girl sitting by the park bench over there with her back craned over trying to stop her mp3 player from dying a horrible death? Wearing nothing more than a t-shirt she bought off of the internet and dirty jeans? With the badly died red hair pulled back with messy barrettes because she hasn't washed it in a few days? With whiter than white skin being literally bleached from sitting in front of a computer screen in like, forever? Oh yeah, that's me.

I would say I was sorry for disappointing your expectations, but I'm not. I excel at not giving a shit.

See the way I figured it, I was pretty much doomed to be an unhappy sack the rest of my life. God certainly hasn't blessed me with good looks, so there really is no point in becoming a giggly nymph for boys I thought attractive; since it was pretty obvious I would never get them anyway. Not even unattractive guys go for unattractive girls, so what was the point? I figure that avoiding disappointment was avoiding any expectations, so therefore, you must avoid interest.

The only thing God really gave me was intelligence, but even that in itself wasn't a big horn I could toot, seeing as I grew up in a place where everyone I knew was a child prodigy, and in extension, a million times smarter than I was. I guess if I was left to my normal devices in a normal society, I would be led to believe that I was pretty much the smartest person on the goddamn planet and every else is an idiot. But even then, being the smartest human being in the real world isn't good enough to be considered intelligent in the whack-job I lived in. So I decided to coast by on my God given smarts which wasn't really all that much, and when it was time for me to leave, I left.

Nothing much to it really. Up until recently, I had been living in a one bedroom apartment with my iguana Hannibal and my crazy landlord that likes to parade around in a white tank chugging down beers and asking for my rent about three weeks early. And her constant hitting on me. It doesn't help that she's sort of cute. But sadly enough I don't hate boys enough to switch to girls, and even though they can be exceedingly viscous and they have the emotional capacity of a walrus, I can't help but wish I was a lesbian, or a dude, because girls are soft and sweet and they have nice hair and they know how to make their eyelids shimmer when they flutter their eyelashes, but sadly enough I can't seem to bring myself to make that transition. So I've predicted that I will die a cold and lonely wench.

Anyway, I was happily living my less than exciting life, working at coffee shops by day and trying to make it big as a pop star sensation at night-HA! Kidding. I was checking to see if you were paying attention. No, actually, I just wander the streets at night for a couple of hours, seeing as that is the only time I like to go out because there are no people around. Once I stopped a guy from mugging a pretty 50's chick. It was pretty cool.

Oh hey! I forgot an important detail. Here I am prattling on about mundane things to start this story off, and I haven't given you my name yet.

Well guess what?

I'm not going too.

But to avoid future confusion, I will tell you that you may call me Saturday Silence. Everyone calls me that. My foster parents called me that, my siblings, wherever the hell they are now, call me that, and people that I meet call me that, so you're going to call me that too.

Saturday Silence. Age 21. Born on September 4th. The last thing I will tell you about myself is that I am Russian, and that's all I will tell you for now.

Alright, I think I've delayed this intro enough, and to get to the matter at hand.

The reason I am telling you this story is because at the moment, I am being kidnapped.

And I am not fucking happy about this.


	2. Jesus Christs and Robots

Okaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay, maybe I was exaggerating a little bit when I said I was being kidnapped. But not about the pissed off part. That was dead on.

I don't know if you can consider being kidnapped by someone you know, and that person is giving you an option to go with them, and they don't force you to get in the car. But I still wasn't happy about it.

The way he worded it, he made it seem that the only choice was to go with him, which wasn't the case.

I could have totally said no, and continued my half content life with Hannibal and my shitty job as a waitress.

But considering the fact that I probably would have felt like complete shit if I didn't agree to it, I decided to go.

But he was totally getting his ass kicked when I got there.

_There was a knock on the door and I was skeptical at first. I normally didn't have any visitors besides Camille aka Land Lord, but when they said it was the police, I shrugged me shoulders and let them in. _

_One man was sort of fidgety, and the other was pretty stoic, with an angry look on his face. I liked him._

"_Saturday Silence?" The fidgety one asked me, and I nodded, while tending to Hannibal, who decided to crawl on top of the coffee table. Well, actually, it was a foot looker with a piece of tape that said COFFEE TABLE, but that didn't matter._

"_Yes, can I help you?"_

"_L sent us."_

_Of course, this caused me to drop Hannibal quite unceremoniously onto the floor. I sat in silence, thinking that sentence over and over in my head. I wanted to ask why L would bother contacting me. I wanted to know what was going on. But I could gander a guess; I didn't like what I came up with. So instead I said, "Get out."_

"_But-"_

"_No, I can already guess what he wants, and I don't give a shit, so get out."_

"_He really wishes for-"_

"_Look, I don't want to break any limbs or possible inflict any bodily harm to either of you, but he's a bastard, I don't care, and I'm losing my patience. Tell him that I decline. Now please leave."_

_As I was rushing them out the door, the stoic one with the fro pushed a laptop into my hands, "He wants to speak with you. So I would listen what he'd have to say first," and with that, they were gone. And I was alone with that freaking cursed laptop in my hands._

_I knew I should have just smashed it with a hammer, but I'm apparently a fucking idiot._

_I set up the laptop on my fake coffee table, and turned it on._

_God help me._

"Everyone, this is my associate, and a new member of the Task Force, Saturday Silence."

"I think associate is too nice of a word," I mumbled under my breath.

"She posses certain talents that will prove useful in the coming investigation. Please treat her with the same respect you would do me." He took a sip of his coffee before adding, "I also apologize in advance for her sarcasm, and it tends to get under most people's skin."

"Asshole," I bit out.

"Watari, will you please direct Saturday to the case files so that she may become as up to date as everyone else? Thank you. And Saturday?"

"Hmmmm…?"

"Thank you for coming."

. . . . .

"Whatever."

"_Saturday," the altered computer voice rang out, "It's a pleasure to finally meet you. Watari has told me much about you."_

"_Whatever, get on with it. You wanted to talk, we'll talk. You're just lucky I didn't destroy this laptop with a drill."_

"_In any case, you will have to destroy this laptop after the conversation is over. But thank you for deciding to speak with me. I can imagine your displeasure about the fact."_

_He was so…calm. I was a bitch and he could care less about my attitude. It was enough for me not to shut the computer down and listen. But I still hated the fact that he was so damn calm._

"_As you probably already guessed, the reason that I am talking to you is because I need help with a case. The Kira case to be specific. And your assistance would be most beneficiary._

"_I'm afraid you're going to have to dig a little deeper than that L," I scowled._

"_You wish for an incentive?"_

_I snorted, "Me? God no, what I mean is give me a reason to give a damn. I honestly don't care, so you're going to have to do better than 'I need help.'"_

"_I see. I thought the fact that you, indeed, are a criminal yourself. I would have thought that any criminal would have given me their assistance to stop the killer targeting them."_

"_You could do better than that," I laughed, "You know as well as I do that wouldn't be enough to cause a stir in me. Besides, we both know that I'm covered in that department. Kira needs a name and face to kill. And I've been wiped from the system since birth. You know that."_

"_Yes, I did. But I know that Kira has killed some of the friends you made in prison. I'm truly sorry about that. I know they must have meant a lot to you." _

"_More than Wammy's ever did." I snarled, before crossing my arms. "I'm sorry, but the answer's still no."_

"_I see," he sighed, "Then I have no choice to begin bargaining. You do this for me, and I'll do something for you."_

"_I told you, I don't want any-"_

"_If you help me catch Kira, I'll help you catch him."_

_I choked on my words._

"_Y-you bastard. That's low, even for you."_

"_I know you've been hunting him down for years now Saturday, and getting no closer to your goal. You use all the money you earn serving people coffee and plates of cholesterol to try and track him down. Well, I'll do it. No, both of us will do it. We'll catch him, if you help me with this case."_

_I was silent. _

_It was deafening. I suffocated in it._

"_Fine," I shook my head, "I'll do it. On one condition."_

"_Yes?"_

"_I get to take Hannibal with me."_

"So, Light Yagami?"

"Yes, what about him?"

"Cute, ain't he?"

"Saturday, do you have anything to contribute, or are you going to make me regret the decision to put you on this case?"

"Both actually, thanks for clearing that up, but seriously, this kid is either Jesus Christ or a robot. I'm leaning toward robot."

L looked over his shoulder at me, a cup of tea that was more sugar cube than anything in his hand, "Care to specify?"

"I've never seen anyone more…perfect. It's kind of scary actually. First off, he's amazingly good looking for a seventeen year old kid. I know that in most movies nowadays, their portrayed like Adonis's, but in reality, they're all pretty much scrawny pock marked gits with bad haircuts. He's exceedingly popular, if these surveillance notes are anything to go by, and he has more than perfect grades. And he takes college courses and night courses. Oh, and he's a star athlete too. What the hell? Where did he get his life and how can I have it?"

"Your point Saturday?"

L was egging me on. The rest of the task force was looking expectantly at me. Except for Sorichio Yagami. He looked pretty pissed.

I guess this was my way of proving myself to them, to show that I wasn't a complete idiot. I shrugged.

"So, what I'm saying is that this kid has probably never heard a bad comment from anyone in his life. And if he did, he'd probably think it was stemmed from jealousy. Guys that look that good are bad enough. Full on narcissism. But him? He probably thinks he IS Jesus. So point one for that God complex theory you were working on."

"Do you think he could be Kira?" Yagami asked from the back.

"I think he has the potential to be him."

"Very good Saturday," L sipped at his tea, "Light Yagami is in fact our main Kira suspect."

"Do I get a gold star?" I exclaimed sarcastically, "I presume you have your next move planned out."

"Not exactly," L put his thumb to his mouth, "We are going to have Light Yagami come here, tomorrow. He will be observing the second Kira tapes that aired yesterday."

"Oh wow," I smiled, "You're determined to baffle me with your bullshit aren't you?"

"Your sarcasm is getting on my nerves. Don't make me hit you."

"Light, it is good to see you again. Before we begin, I would like to introduce you to the new member of the Task Force. She has been with us for a couple of weeks now."

Light Yagami.

I don't like you.

It's uncharacteristic really. I normally reserve my hatred for idiots and people that piss me off, but there was something about him that made me want to punch babies.

"Hello, it's nice to you," he smiled at me before giving me his hand to shake. I kept my arms crossed, before growling, "The feeling's mutual. I'm Saturday Silence."

"Saturday is incredibly sarcastic and ill-tempered toward everyone she meets. Don't be offended." L reassured Light after he threw a particularly nasty look in my direction.

Well hello Mr. I'm fucking Perfect. I'm Saturday, that's a Ms. Silence to you. You want to shake my hand? Well, I want to slam a fucking doorknob on your junk therefore making your ability to reproduce doubtful. That's you scowling at me? Well this is me giving you the bird. How'd you like that you little shit?

Sometimes, the things I really want to say I keep to myself. I do posses the natural ability of finding people's buttons and pushing them until they exploded, but I try to refrain from too much bullying on my part. After all, no one wants to see a grown man cry. That'd be kind of awkward.

Okay, I guess this is the part where I start explaining the whole situation to you. You've probably all heard of this story before, so why do I bother to explain it? You all know about L, the world famous detective, who is now, sadly, dead. You all know about Wammy's house, and his successors, and the first two successors, A, who killed himself, and B, who turned out to be a murderer. You all know that Light is Kira, and that Misa is the second Kira. So why would you sit here and listen to me tell you about some story you've all heard millions of times.

Because goddamn it, this is my story, so don't you forget that.

Now, you're probably going to get all skeptical when I sit here and tell you this story, and you're probably thinking, well, why haven't I heard of you before? And you've already said you aren't the sharpest tool in the shed, why would L ask you to help ? When he already has a whole mansion full of child prodigies that are a million times smarter than you are?

Well, I'll answer those questions, goddamnit.

I was never mentioned in the case because well, I didn't have real documentation. Duh. Like you saw in the convenient flashback before, I was wiped the day I was born. And I was serious about that. Don't ask, you'll find out soon enough. So this goes on to the second question. Why would L ask me for help? Normally, I would be a smartass and tell you that I would like to know that too, but I can pretty much guess why. Within the normal reality rules, I was just about as unkillable as L, until fate decided to throw in the second Kira into the mix. I don't think I would be able to find me on any server on the planet. So, if L did manage to kick the bucket, he would want me to keep a watchful eye on his suspects. Double precaution, I would say.

And the reason he probably didn't ask anyone from Wammy's house to join in on the search is because they still had a future. Still had the potential to be become little L's. And me? Let's face it. I had no future.


	3. Thirteen is My Lucky Number

Judging from the way the others had treated me, I could only assume they thought me to be just as quirky as L was. Everyone seemed to have a quirk. But not so much as noticeable as the Wammy Kids.

L loved to eat sweets. He loved to eat sweets because he stood up all night doing work. And because of that, he now possessed the dark rings under his eyes. He wore the same thing every day because he found that wondering what he was going to wear in the morning trifle and boring. He didn't comb his hair because there wasn't a point to it if it was just going to be messy again.

I didn't like sweet things. I didn't like pastries or brownies or strawberries. I did like grapes, and pie. Chocolate pie. I also like candy. Sour candy. But I also ate other variety of things besides that. I'm only human. Who, I'll admit, can put things away and make the world wonder where it all goes.

That's the kind of person I am I guess. The, 'If the world gives you a lemon, make grape juice and let the world wonder how you did it,' kind of girl.

L didn't like being in the company of stupid people. They irritated him. I, on the other hand, love stupid people. I like to watch them from the side walk as they trip over safety cones.

But, I hate to admit, I did have one quirk. And it had nothing to do with eating. Or things I did.

Socks. It was the socks okay.

Since as far as I could remember, I don't think I've ever worn a matching pair of socks. Ever.

I don't really have a reason for it, but then again, I don't think L really has a truly valid reason for sitting the way he does.

So yeah, I wore unmatching socks. So, that stands to reason that I had a lot of socks.

It burns me to say it, but one of my suit cases was actually just my socks.

Anyway, there you have it! Saturday Silence's famous quirks.

On to the story.

Nothing much had happened over the course of the next few weeks. Unless of course, you count the fact that Light Yagami and his bubble headed girl friend, Misa Amane, were now locked up and put under surveillance as the first and second Kira.

So, yeah, nothing much.

I had been playing around with Hannibal on the couch when we received a very mysterious phone call. It was very mysterious. Well, it was enough to make L look scared for the first time since I met him.

The phone call contained incredibly annoying laughter. Kinda like this:

"Kyeheheheheheh! Kyuhuhuhuhuhuh! KYAhahahahahahaha!"

That's the last time I'll do that.

It also had a picture message.

A woman's body. Her throat cut and her wide green eyes looking blankly at the screen.

'13 13' was cut into her cheek.

So besides the nothingness of the past couple of days, all of this was beginning to get a bit exciting.

L was determined to not let anyone in on this turn of events, but it was his fault that he let in a genius. A genius that previously use to revere him when she was a child and had access to the many case files that were found in Wammy's library.

So while the others were out doing whatever it is they do, I was snuggled up in an arm chair with Hannibal, chuckling to myself while L isolated himself. Trying to hide the fact that he wasn't bothered by the call.

But I knew better.

"L," I sneered, "You're going to have to deal with BB sooner or later."

He didn't speak at my comment, but he did chuck a cup of tea at my head.

"And they say I'm childish!"

"I'm going to ignore the fact that you mentioned him, and I'll ask that you leave me with the burden. It doesn't concern you."

"Don't flatter yourself. This concerns me more than you let on."

"Saturday…."

"He'll want me dead just because I talked to you through the laptop."

"Yes, that is probably true."

I huffed at his indifference, before snarling, "I thought he was dead."

"It seems that there was a mistake in the asylum," L managed to look angry.

"Yeah, that would appear so," I flicked at Hannibal's tail, "Shame. I heard the only reason you took this case is because Kira killed him."

He didn't say anything again, but I took his silence. Sighing, I looked down at Hannibal again, shrugging, "So, what do you suggest we do?"

He put his thumb to his mouth, before pondering, "I wonder….."

"What?"

"If you can manage to look decent if you cleaned yourself up a bit."

The thought struck me, he wasn't one to make comments such as those one. He pretty much was a complete failure when it came to anything social. So when he commented on my apparent lack of looks, I glared like any girl would.

"Excuse me?"

"Well, I would admit that Ms. Amane may make a better substitute, but seeing as she is the 2nd Kira suspect, I can't allow her to do what I have in mind."

"And what do you have in mind exactly?"

"Something akin to bait."

"WHAT?"

"Do not get worked up just yet, I have yet to come up with a plan of action."

"Well, can we stick to something that doesn't turn me into 90% of the female population and out of harm's way?"

"I'll do my best, I assure you."

"Asshole."

_I had begged for a pet when I was young enough to give a shit to care about a living animal. So when Roger came into my room with what looked like to be a lizard, I tried to flush it down the toilet. I had wanted a dog. A big one. To hopefully attack some of the boggarts that teased me about my freckles._

_But Roger is smarter than I can give him credit for, and he probably came up with that conclusion. I guess I was just lucky he didn't try to give me a fish._

_So, being the creepy gnome that I am, I decided to name him Hannibal, after Dr. Hannibal Lector from the infamous Silence of the Lambs movie. I'll admit that I had a small crush on Jodie Foster in that film, and naming an animal after a guy who ate people had its appeal._

_He turned out to be a Green Iguana, and that suited me fine, because he was a pretty ugly lizard, and that scared the shit out of most kids._

_I was around 15 at the time. And by then, I had mostly gotten over it. At 15, I had gotten over what happened to me, when it took most people the rest of their lives to get over. But I couldn't ponder on the past. It had been nine years for god's sakes._

_And I couldn't let that control my life._

"I feel stupid," I mumbled under my breath.

"You don't look anywhere near it."

"Shut up. I hate you. I hate these clothes. And I hate my hair. Thanks."

"You're welcome. Although I'm not entirely sure why you would be opposed to this sort of thing. It's not like you care what you looked like."

"The point is now I look like I care what I look like."

"That made no sense."

"Up yours."

I can't believe I agreed to this. The idea was just….idiotic. Besides, it's not like the psycho would chose me over the million others in Japan. I'm sure there are other people with the initials B.B. Right?

Right?

"We uploaded you into the system," L informed me, "We'll use the same scenario Naiomi Miseroa found herself in when she met Beyond. I trust that you have your badge and gun on you?"

"Yes Mother," I sneered.

"You may have to drop the biting sarcasm, I doubt B would appreciate it."

"Then he can kiss my ass."

"Saturday…"

"Right, right….."

"Do you want me to go over the plan once more?"

"Well, I've already listened to it about a million times already, why not once more for good luck?"

Aiwazia looked just about as fed up with me as L was, but he held his tongue. Matsuda looked just as clueless as he usually is.

"Today, you will be dropped off at the murder scene. You'll present yourself as Detective Bridget Beckett. Now, you will mostly be alone. Investigate what you can. The chances that Beyond will be at the murder scene is about 39.7%, so be cautious. Don't give away your true intent for any reason. He will probably refer to himself as Rue Ryuzaki. He will also look similar to me. If he even suspects you in the slightest, he will try to kill you. We will be nearby and watching your every move. Once you are able to get him out in the open, we will move in and arrest him."

He took another sip of his infamous coffee, and asked if we had any questions.

"Ryuzaki, why doesn't one of us just go into the scene and lure B out?" Matsuda asked, "I mean, she could get hurt. He is a dangerous murderer, and we are the police. Wouldn't we be more qualified?"

"No, I'm afraid that wouldn't work," L frowned, "At the off chance that there will be other investigators there, we can't have one of them recognize you and try to speak with you. That would completely blow your cover."

He took a bit out of cake, before continuing, "Besides, B is more likely to trust a woman than a man, with the premise in mind that he can overpower her. He will probably avoid all the other male investigators altogether." He finished chewing, and concluded, "Also, if you are concerned about Saturday's safety, you shouldn't worry. Due to her rather…colorful….past, she is more than capable of defending herself if need be. What type of fighting is it that you specialize in, Saturday?"

I huffed. Like he didn't already know.

"Sambo." I said noncommitingly.

"Sambo." He smiled, "Doesn't it stem from the roots in Japanese judo and Karate, plus traditional folk styles of wrestling such as the Romanian Trîntǎ, and the Mongolian Khapsagay?"

"Yeah, that's right." I frowned.

"Yes, I'm sure that Saturday is more than capable to defend herself."

I knew flattery when I heard it.


	4. What's My Name?

We stationed ourselves at the murder scene for so long I was beginning to get use to the smell of the dead woman in the next room. Her name was Daisy Decanter, and she was beautiful.

During the time there, I discovered more than I wanted to know about her.

She lived with her lover, a girl named Rachael Dubrie, who was five years her junior. They had yet to inform her about what had happened, seeing as she was nowhere to be found. I found her picture in various areas around the flat. Daisy had pretty green eyes and dark purple hair. Her lover had masses of rich, chocolate brown hair with blue eyes. And even in tiny photo booth portraits, you could tell they were perfect for each other.

Daisy worked at the coffee shop down the street, and Rachael drove a delivery truck.

They seemed to love Quentin Tarantino movies, and Stephen King novels. Their fridge was packed with cheap wine and fresh fruit. They grew Scarlet Carsons outside their window. The bed was unmade, evidence of lovemaking left there from the previous morning.

I left to the bathroom for a quick five minute cry. Moments like these seemed to be enough to make me care. Just a little bit.

But it had been seven hours. And Rue Ryuzaki still failed to show up. I called Matsuda from a pay phone outside, and he got the OK from L for me to start heading back. They couldn't risk a car, so I headed over to the nearest bus stop.

Before getting there, I caught my reflection at the window. And I spit at it.

My red hair had been done up with ornamental flower clips, keeping it out of my face. And my face. Ugh. I wore cover up to hide my transparent white skin. My eyes were smoky and gray, and my lips were red.

I was wearing adult clothes, I guess. At least, I didn't look like a teenage girl anymore.

A nice blouse, with a trench coat and a scarf. A skirt that reached just above my knees and black boots.

For the first time in my life, I was slightly attractive. If you discounted my sneer and angry eyes and the too big features on my face.

I turned away from the reflection, and began to head toward my destination.

But you know something?

Life is such a fickle bitch.

_I hated math. I hated math, and I hated people that were good at math, and I hated people who liked math._

_So, math wasn't really my strongest suites when I was seventeen. And people in my classes always made fun of me because I always got the worse grades. Not that my grades were terrible. But they were still unacceptable. _

_Roger had talked to me once about it. At my lack of giving a damn. I never really tried to do better. Not like the other kids, who tried and tried to do better and be the best. Watching them work actually made me tired. He thought if I just applied myself, I would stop being last rate. _

_But I don't care enough to try._

_Someone had to be last anyway. And better me who didn't give a shit then someone who would probably have a conniption fit and put a bullet through their heads. _

_One friend I had, D, or Deicide, had a mental breakdown in the middle exams. Well, actually, she had jumped off the roof. She only broke her legs and a couple of ribs, but it was enough to make me feel pretty fucking rebellious. So I went to Roger and told him that they were pushing us too hard. We were only human and we may have been child prodigies, but that was the thing. We were only kids._

_We were only kids._

_We were only kids trying to do our best._

I pushed past an arrogant git on a skateboard out of my sightline, when I saw him.

And my mouth opened before I could realize my mistake.

"Ryuzaki?"

The man in question was young, probably around my age. And although L had said they looked alike, he failed to mention that he may as well could've been his twin.

B. Rue Ryuzaki. Beyond Birthday.

His head shot up at the mere mention of his name and he smiled.

_OH SHIT!_

I jumped at the smile, and my face drained. He knew. He knew I knew L.

So I did what any sane person would do. I ran.

I ran like hell and rounded an abandoned corner. I could feel him behind me. He laughed.

And I was corned like a fly.

The spider came closer, his mouth dripping with venom.

He said four words that made me wish the ground would open up and swallow me whole.

"Hello there, Subbota Molchanie."


	5. Serial Killer Surgeon

There are certain things you must avoid when being cornered by a psychotic murderer. One of them was kneeing them in the stomach when they got too close.

He heaved at impact, and I was momentarily stunned, mostly because I didn't think it would work.

Of course, if my old instructor had seen me hesitate at such a critical moment, he would have walked over and beat my ass, but he can't, seeing as he's dead.

So instead, BB latched onto the scarf I was wearing and dragged me down to the floor. I fell on to my back, and he brought his foot down onto my throat. I tried to smack him away, but I couldn't. He was too strong. I struggled, but he never wavered his hold on me, and part of me cursed these clothes to the seventh layer of hell. The other part of my agreed.

BB smirked once he was satisfied that I wasn't going to get up. And in an instant he looked nothing like L. Something about him, it was all wrong. Like he died and went to hell, and it spat him back out again. I trembled under that gaze, and something deep into my brain, the part that was animalistic and buried, wanted to run and hide and fight.

I kicked at him, struggling more and more, and he lifted his foot and smashed it against my face.

Everything went black.

_If there is anything that prison taught me, it's that orange never goes with anything._

_At the time, I had purple hair, so I'm pretty sure I resembled something akin to a circus clown._

_I was small. Smaller than the average 18 year old, so when the old dears started to harasses me, I made them realize that they should never threaten me while I had something that can be used as a weapon in my hands._

_I had knocked them out, and left them in the laundry room. One girl they had been harassing, Francine, or Frankie, had thanked me profusely, and she never left my side again._

_She never told me what she was in for, which was fine with me, because I never told anyone what I was in for either. She did introduce me to some other girls that she had befriended, and I found myself being pulled into their group more often than I would have liked. They were all on Murderer Row, which I found odd, but they treated me with respect so I treated them with respect. And when the old dears came back after me, they were sure to watch my back. So in a way, they were more a family than I had ever had. But I never said it to their faces; otherwise they'd probably string me from my thumbs._

_One girl, Lily, was a con artist, and she killed her boyfriend when she found out he was going to leave her and take all their money from their heists. She was smooth with her words, and she convinced the guards to do things for her that I hadn't imagined possible. And she didn't even have to sleep with them._

_Her partner, Linda, was stoic and PMS'ing most of the time. She hardly ever said a word to me, but she knew everything. She knew who got in for what, she knew who to go to if you wanted specialty items, and she knew who was going to be planning a break out, and they would have to buy her silence. A tricky bitch she was, so I steered clear from her most of the time._

_Then there was our resident couple, Rickie and Diana. They came in a couple and they left a couple. Their parole came through around the same time before I got out, but I would miss them the most. Rickie was a nerd, and Diana was a, to put it nicely, a voluptuous idiot that liked to try to create different alcoholic concoctions with the fruit she collected. Then she tried to get me wasted, which was fun._

_I go out a couple months after, for paying the right prices and on account of my good behavior._

_In normal circumstances, I never should have left. Even I hadn't forgiven myself for what I did._

I woke up on a cold, dank floor. My trench coat, scarf, and boots were gone, so I scurried over to the corner and shivered to myself. A rat passed by me, so I chucked a rock at it. Last thing I wanted was to die by rabies.

BB came in a little while later, laughing to himself, and this was the first time I noticed he had red eyes.

"Detective Bridgett Becket?" he laughed, "Surely Lawli could've done better than that!" He giggled to himself at that, and fingered the fake badge in his hands.

"Subbota Molchanie?" he giggled again, "That's Russian isn't it hmmmmm?"

I didn't answer him, I just stared at the wall behind him in defiance, but he continued on anyway.

"I thought so, so I decided to look you up, and funnily enough, I couldn't seem to find you!" He exclaimed, arms out in surprise, "No birth records, hospital records, school records. Why, it's like you don't even exist at all!"

He walked over to me, fingers running down my face, and he whispered excitedly, "This just makes me 80.5% sure that you are a very important person. More important so, that you recognize my face, which means that you have seen Lawli. Very interesting."

He brushed the hairs off my face, grinning as he did so, shaking with happiness, "This makes my so happy Subbota! Very happy! That Lawli decided to send a priceless little bird to me! I should return the favor, shouldn't I? I want to show Lawli that I appreciate his gift! But what should I send? Hmmmmm?"

He looked like he was pondering seriously, but I kept my mouth shut. He wasn't talking to me. In fact, I probably wasn't even there to him. I didn't matter. The only thing that mattered was L. Lawli, I guessed, was L's real name. Part of me questioned why this madman knew his name, but he knew my name too, just by my face.

Just like the 2nd Kira.

"Perhaps a lock of your hair? Or maybe I should send back that nice little scarf? Or maybe….."

He grabbed my hand, pulling it to his face to examine, "One of your pretty little fingers? How does that sound to you, little bird?"

Experience has taught me that when a psycho is taunting you, you shouldn't goad him. Especially when your life is literally in his hands. But against my better judgment, instead of trying to talk him out of his insane monologue, my mouth opened and said,

"Well, if you're going to start hacking off fingers, can you take one from the left? I'm quite fond of my right hand. Or perhaps my toes? I'm not using those."

His face told me that he wasn't expecting that sort of reaction from me. He looked confused, angry, and slightly hurt. He went back to examining my hands, before he began to laugh again. Well, at least he was a cheerful homicidal maniac.

"You're an odd little bird. I noticed that. You look slightly older than me, but you seem to be just as mature as a thirteen year old girl without the whiny mood swings. I almost thought you were a detective when I saw you, but you're not, are you? Although, I find it hard to believe that Lawli would send an idiot to trick me into coming out of my hidey hole. You're not an idiot are you? No, you're probably even brighter than that other bird he sent after me. The swan, Niaomi Misora. So you're not a detective, you're intelligent, you know what Lawli looks like, and you're real name is nowhere to be found in any database I bothered to look in. So this means…"

He stood up, and walked towards the door. BB burst out into laughter right before reaching it, "Lawli sent one of his darling successors, didn't he? At least, you grew up as one of the precious orphans in Wammy's house?" He laughed, taking my shocked silence as a yes.

I was bewildered. He put it all together, and so quickly…..?

"Tomorrow is going to be so much fun Subbota! I know it! And soon, me and Lawli will have fun too! Goodnight!"

He didn't start with the basics. As soon as he walked in the next morning, he kicked me in my already cramping stomach from hunger, and he did it until I vomited all over the floor. He made me clean it up, and afterwards is when he began his fun.

He made me take off my blouse so he could write BB on my back with one of his knives, and then he made me put it on again, but not before soaking it in Peroxide. My back stung, and then he strapped me to a chair so I wouldn't be able to arch away from it. He stitched my mouth shut for a particularly sarcastic comment I made about his torture methods. He opened it back up again with a rusty knife, and I could taste old blood that he hadn't washed. I gagged and tried to throw up again, but he held his hand over my mouth and made me swallow it. He burned the sides of my eye, but nowhere near so that he may blind me. For lunch, half a jar of Strawberry Jam. He made me sit at the table with him, and he smiled at me as if we were two friends. He dragged me back into my room and broke my arm, before resetting it so I was sure it would never work properly again.

I had to admire his single-minded determination at the complete and utter destruction of my will. He was pretty creative when it came to torturing. He wasn't sure what would work, so most of the time, the things he did to me was experimentation.

I lost a few fingers and he stitched them back on again, and he explored my ankles by cutting open my skin and sticking nails to the bone. At that time, I was a crying blubbery mess, but I was also stubborn, and no amount of torture could get me to spill the secret location of L. Partly because I wanted to be an asshole for all the things he was doing to me, and also because I didn't know where L was in the first place. I tried to make that known to him, but he told me he wanted to be absolutely sure I wasn't lying to him, so he broke off my fingernails and called it a day. I don't think I had screamed so much in one sitting, and the next day, my voice was hoarse.

When he came in the next morning, he brought all kinds of bandages and stitches and endless amounts of painkiller goodies with him. He tended to my burns and fixed me back all proper again, stitching all of my scars and applying bandages to my fingers and gaping wounds. He talked to me while he did so, and even though he was a psycho, I could see that he was worthy of being L's number two. He was smart. Smarter than I was, and I had to try my hardest to catch up to what he was saying. He called me a rube. A well-scrubbed rube that had lost all of its shine. I told him that I would call him a monster, but that I wouldn't because even monsters had some dignity. He laughed at that, commenting that monsters were monsters because normal people didn't know what to call him. This led to me saying that he wasn't much of a person. He only looked human, and if you looked inside without the skin, you would find that he wasn't much of anything. He looked angry at that, probably because he was a little sore about the fact that he was a backup. So I quickly added in that most humans weren't much of person anyway either, and he smiled at me and laughed.

He changed his mind about me than, and he called me a jaded misanthropic, which I supposed was better than a rube.

When he was done with bandaging me up, he made me sit in a soundproof room listening to music through a pair of headphones. At maximum volume. He didn't stop until I was bleeding out of my ears.

He then hit me on the head with what I think was a metal bat, which I'm pretty sure gave me a concussion. I couldn't hear anymore, and he led me to my dank room again and mouthed out that he would talk to me again tomorrow. He put me to sleep and proceeded to wake me up every four hours so I wouldn't slip into a coma. When I woke up, I felt like I was hung over. Not the nice hung over. The bad kind.

He made me a jelly sandwich, strawberry, (how freaking surprising) and he made me nap before getting me up so he could interrogate me. He took out my back molar when I refused to talk, and he taped my mouth shut so I almost choked on my own blood. While he fixed that up, he started yelling at me. Apparently, he didn't appreciate my Betty Bad Ass attitude and that he would sooner kill me than put up with more of my bull shit. At that moment, I think he might have considered robbing me of the one virtue I had left. But he decided to just simply beat the living shit out of me. No fancy torture methods. No interesting experiments. Just fists meeting my face and bruising my body. I don't think Beyond raped for his own pleasure. I suspected that he only used it just to break his victim even more, if the situation called for it. And he probably figured, with my attidude, that I really couldn't give a shit if he did rape me. I didn't waste my time thinking about sex, and I didn't really find a need to engage in it. I didn't hold in high regard, and I wasn't waiting to give it away to the right person.

Rape, to me, would only count as a small misfortunate in my life. Not some life shattering experience that would leave me shaking and helpless to the rest of the world.

I'm leaving out how I cried like a little baby, and that I felt closer to death than I had ever felt in a while. I'm sure I could describe how the pain felt. That it would leave me blank and helpless and that a couple of times, I had to bite my tongue because I wanted to beg for death. I was no stranger to torture, I had my fair share of it when I was young. You know something is wrong with the world when a twenty one year old already knew what pain and suffering felt like as if it was an old friend knocking on their door. But I really won't describe to you, because there really are no words for it. All I can say is that if I can't find words in the English dictionary to tell you the magnitude of the pain I felt, than you should figure out that it was ten sheets of suck is what it was.

So, to put it simply, I finally cracked. I had spent less than a week with the maniac, and he broke me.

I told him that L changed hotels every week, somewhere in the lower Kanto region, and that they were usually so elobaroate I felt dirty just to sit on the couch. That he rode around in a Bentley Limosine, and that he was close to solving the Kira Case, so if he wanted to get to L, he better make it soon.

The Kira Case. That is what interested Beyond, and soon he got me to talk about what had been going on. I told him who the suspect was, who the second Kira was. I told him who worked on the case, I told him about the evidence we had. I told him the extreme risks L had taken just for this case.

BB asked me how much closer where we from breaking open the case. I told him all we needed was a confession.

And then he asked what would happen should the circumstances make it impossible to obtain one.

I said I didn't know. We'd probably go back to square one.

He laughed, before finally leaving me to my thoughts. He gave me a shot of morphine, and I heard no more of Beyond Birthday until the next day.

_One day a year, when I was a child, my parents would let me go outside and play. And I always picked the first day the snow fell. Snow was a big deal where I came from, me and my brothers would always be the first to wake, and the last ones to come back inside. They liked to pull me around in our toboggan while the dogs chased us. And we spent most of the day building the best snow fort ever made so we could attack my older sisters when they left the house. I made snow angels all over our front yard until my mother yelled at me to stop messing up the rose bed, and then I would build a snowman in front of my nanny's window so I could scare her for being so strict with me all the time. _

_Me and my brothers loved to climb trees and hurl snowballs at all the servants, but we always avoided Beth, the laundry woman, because she was nice and gave us candy. Then we would go to the tree house and make up battle plans for the kids we didn't like, and we would all climb into our eldest brother's car and he would drive us into town and we would find the kids that teased us at school and we'd spray them with fire exstinguishers filled with water, and we'd laugh as they cried and froze where they stood._

_Then we'd head back home and run around inside and played with the few toys we owned, and the cook would fix us our favorite lunches. After wards, we 'd go out in search of the biggest hill and ride down it until it was time for us to go to bed._

_I was very little then, I'm surprised that I could remember at all._

_But those days are gone now. They are dead and buried with the rest of my family. I often dream about days like that, but I wake up in a cold sweat and terror when I realize that the people in my dreams have no faces. And I feel sick to my stomach that I can't even remember what my own siblings looked like, and I don't even have pictures to remind myself._

_Other people, therapists that I had quit when I was old enough to know I didn't really give a shit, had told me it wasn't my fault that I could remember. I was too little. I was only six._

_But I feel furious and hateful on the inside because I can remember him so clearly, as if it was yesterday, and I can't even remember my parents' names anymore._

_I just know, deep inside, once my revenge has been sated, the real healing could begin._

It took Beyond four days to find L. Four days I sat in that chair and almost died of thirst.

He came back and made me drink out of a bucket of dish water, and I drank it hungrily.

He seemed gleeful at the fact that he was so close to L, and I felt sick to my stomach that I had outed him to this weirdo.

He brought me clothes, a fresh change of jeans and a t-shirt that said 'Camp Kill Yourself' (in Japanese), made me shower, and tended to my wounds. Once he was finished, he shot me with another dose of morphine and gave me Jam to eat. I honestly felt better afterwards, or maybe it was just the drugs talking.

He took me out of his hidey hole and walked me down the city towards to what I knew was L.


	6. Carrie White is my Hero

We reached a hotel, this one more elaborate than the last, and he marched me right to the receptionist and asked if someone named 'Ryuzaki' had checked into a room. When she said, Yes, there was a Mr. Ryuzaki rooming in the Presidential Suite on the top floor, he told her to tell him that his twin brother had arrived, and that he brought along his dear friend, Bridgett Becket.

Watari came down to meet us. He asked BB if he was holding any weapons, and Beyond laughed and said he just so happened to leave them at home. Watari spared a glance at me, and I just looked down at my feet in shame.

He brought the both of us to L's room, and I wanted to have the elevator to just crash and kill us all. I felt sick to my stomach and I wanted to throw up.

Then the more annoying part in my brain wondered if anyone was feeding Hannibal.

We reached the room, and L sat at his usual seat, alone, an incredibly annoyed look on his face.

"Backup," he said, "Please release Saturday at once. She is not part of this."

Beyond growled, more furious than I had ever seen him, and I briefly thought he was going to shoot up and attack L. But he remained at my side.

"It's _Beyond. Beyond Birthday_. I would have thought we would have gotten past that LAW-LEE-EHT."

L frowned, crushing the tea cup in his hands. Any minute the room was going to explode out of sheer anger.

"And no, I'm not going to release my bird. If you didn't want her to be a part of this, then you shouldn't have sent her to me. I like my gift."

L growled under his breath, before readjusting his composure and tried to talk to B again.

"Beyond," L started, "This standoff isn't getting us anywhere. I propose we make a deal."

"Oooh! What kind of a deal?" he laughed and held my hand, "Look at how precious you are little bird! One look at you and Lawli starts to make deals with criminals."

"I will allow you to work alongside me. B, isn't that what you want? You will not be under me. You shall be my equal."

B started to giggle, squeezing my hand so tightly I winced, "Hmmm, sounds good Lawli. But why would you want my help? From what hmmmmm, Saturday, is it, tells me, you are already close to catching your culprit?"

"There has been a minor setback," L frowned, "From what it looks like, my number one suspect has appeared to lose all his memories of being Kira."

"What?" I spluttered out, "How is that possible?"

"At this point in the investigation, I will need someone with superior deductive skills, and you are the closest person that could ever match me in intelligence Beyond. Not even A was as close as me as you were. I'm asking for your help B."

That pushed a couple of Beyond's happy buttons. He smiled, probably imagining him and L working side by side eating Strawberry cake together.

"I'm just asking that you let Saturday go. She is also invaluable to this investigation, and of no use to you. Release her immediately."

"Hmmmmm…." Beyond pondered playfully, before adding, "Throw in two jars of jam and you have a deal. Three jars….four. A limitless supply."

I pulled myself out B's grasp and stormed away from the both of them, "We're all happy? Good. Happy for all of us. Where's my lizard?"

"In the kitchen. No, I wasn't going to eat him. Watari just fed him before you arrived. He crawled into my arm chair while I was sleeping and frightened me."

Beyond loved Hannibal, which irritated the hell out of me? And Hannibal liked Beyond, and that bugged me even more.

While we were alone in my room, I fed him some moths I caught in my windowsill, and I muttered under my breath, "How could you do this to the person who feeds you? Does the extra snacks I get for you mean nothing?"

Beyond flounced in, telling my excitedly that Kira was going to be arriving soon. I guess that meant the plan L had with Sorichio worked, so I scooped up Hannibal in my arms and went to go wait with him in the waiting room.

Light walked in, with his incredibly annoying girlfriend Misa Amane. But her bubbliness wasn't enough to distract me from the handcuffs L and Light had on. Beyond looked like he was about to have kittens.

He moved to attack Light, but I flung Hannibal into his face to stop him. It was probably the greatest idea I ever had. Now when I was feeling especially depressed, I could pull up the memory of Beyond screaming and flailing around the room trying to declaw Hannibal from his face.

L looked at Beyond, commenting that if he didn't behave himself, he was going to handcuff him to me, and I stopped laughing abruptly after that.

I gathered up Hannibal back into my arms, and he hissed at Beyond, which made me smile a little on the inside.

"Now is not the time to act childishly. Saturday, if you throw Hannibal at anyone else, he'll be put in a zoo. Understand?" L frowned.

"Hmmmm," I growled, "YA sobirayusʹ skryvatʹ yego v odyeyalo, poka vy spite."

"I know Russian Saturday, and if you carry out your threat I'll hide something in YOUR bed covers while you sleep and it won't be an animal."

"Yebatʹ sebya."

It was uncharacteristic of me to laugh at anything. You'll catch me doing it a couple of times, but usually it's so subtle most people hardly notice.

So, on the second day of moving into our new facility, (Which was BITCHIN by the way), I looked up what the general public was thinking about Kira. And I happened across something that made me laugh so hard I couldn't breathe for a couple of minutes.

L looked extremely annoyed with me while I laughed my ass off, and became even more annoyed when B decided to join in on my laughter for no apparent reason.

I wiped some tears from my eyes and started to apologize profusely, and then Matsuda made the mistake of asking what I was laughing about, which made me giggle some more before I finally told him.

"I typed in Kira in the Google bar and I found something I wasn't expecting to find."

"What?"

I smirked, "Someone posted a joke about Kira."

"Yeah! What's it say!"

"Matsuda!"

"Sorry Chief."

B leaned over my shoulder and read aloud, "Kira can kill anybody on the planet, but he cannot kill Chuck Norris. If Kira tried to kill Chuck Norris, Kira will automatically die of a heart attack."

B instantly began to giggle, while everyone looked confused and L looked extremely irritated.

"I fail to find the humor in that joke."

"That's because you're a stick in the mud. Kira just became the butt of American culture."

"Isn't everyone?" BB's giggling increased.

"I'm putting that on a t-shirt. That's just too good."

"Can we focus on other things? Since you decided to waste our time Saturday, you can start. Have you found anything worth sharing?"

"Well, if these cheap ass websites are anything to go by, I'd say they were put up by a bunch of suicidal wannabe's that find Kira's way of doing things to be pretty damn macabre."

"To the point?"

"Kira is attracting the minorities of society. Weirdoes, Goths, Emo kids, sadists, hormonal 13 year old girls. Look at Misa. I hardly have to go into detail."

"What about this Saturday?" L glared.

"He's attracting people that relate to what he's doing. Hell, when I was thirteen, I wore the same shit Misa does and fantasized how I was going to kill all the little trolls that were making my life a living hell. It wasn't a pretty phase, believe me. It's like putting Carrie White on top of a pedestal."

"Huh?" Light was the one to ask this, and I almost started laughing again at the confused look on his face.

"Carrie. Carrie White? She's a fictional character in a horror novel by Stephen King. Basically it's about a young girl who is pretty much tormented by her peers and terrorized by her religiously fanatic mother. The twist is that she has telekinesis, and at her Senior Prom, they pour a bucket of pig blood on her and she snaps, using her powers to massacre the students and burn down half the city."

"I think it's fair to say that Kira did not go through emotional turmoil, and it doesn't justify his crimes," Yagami pointed out, but I cut him off.

"No, no, no, that's just biased thinking. Let's face it, we're not looking for an excuse to pardon Kira's actions, and if we throw in a shitty life, it'll be all the easier for us to simply give him a life sentence instead of an execution. See, just by telling you the fact that Carrie was tormented her whole life, it gives her sympathy, but it doesn't condone what she did. The general public that agree with what Kira is doing condone him simply because they imagine he's just as much of a tortured soul they are. In fact, if we were to go out and randomly ask who supported or didn't support Kira country by country, it'll be harder to find a normal, well-rounded person who supports him. And what with different beliefs and all, it would vary around the globe. So no matter how much Kira wants to believe that people are supporting him, it actually looks a lot fewer than it seems."

"This makes me feel better about this case. Thank you," L sighed.

"What I want to hear is what Saturday feels about it," Matsuda piped in, "We've all shared are thoughts about it, in the beginning, even Beyond went as far as to say that he thinks Kira is a wuss for killing people the 'easy way'….."

"Which I find insulting," L added while BB just laughed.

"But you seem to be the only one here who doesn't really have an opinion of what Kira is doing. You're treating this more like a job than any of us, and we're the ones that are getting paid."

Matsuda had his moments, when he actually thought about what he was saying. I shrugged, before just letting my mind out about the subject.

"I don't condone Kira because I think he is a sin against nature." I said simply, and even L seemed to think my opinion was a little harsh.

"Look, where I grew up, I was always taught to believe that there are two kinds of death. Good ones and bad ones. Good deaths happened if the person who died lived a full life, or if simply nature decided to take them away. Bad deaths were accidents, murders, suicides, etc. Anything that would indicate someone has died before their time to leave earth. To me, Kira has gained a power to take people's lives before their time. His very existence goes against nature, and eventually, this will lead to chaos. That's what I think."

"I never looked at it that way." Light muttered, "I thought what Kira was doing was wrong because it goes against morality and the justice system we built up for ourselves. I know that there are flaws, but it isn't right to kill people, no matter what the reason. But from your point of view, you go as far as to saying that Kira is defying the universe's plan."

"Yes," I nodded, "Whoever gave Kira this power is reckless."

"Who? Are we to believe that some higher power is doing this?" L mused, "No, that's no good. That means this higher power cannot be stopped."

"If we're going to believe that someone could just _will_ another human being to have a heart attack, why not explore all the possibilities? Maybe there is another force at work here. Or maybe Kira is a mutant, like Carrie, with telekinetic-like abilities?"

I huffed, "That's it. I know what angle I'll be working on. Can you please have Watari bring me as many folklore books as he can?"

"What you're planning is all theoretical, and can't be proven with evidence." L mused.

"Maybe not. Maybe there's something we missed. Something we weren't looking for. Either way, we can't be sure until we stressed every possibility."

"Hmmmm," L smiled slightly, "I'm impressed. You've won your case Saturday. I will allow you to work that angle. But you won't just work on folklore. You will be studying up legends, myths, ghost stories so to speak. I'd concentrate the ones on death if I were you."

"Thank you. I'm sure I'll find something. I know it."

Misa Amane was not a fun person to be around with. I kind of want to claw out my eyes every time she opens her mouth to speak.

It doesn't help, that the off chance Misa comes to join us in the investigation floor, that she looks me up and down and shakes her head in that infuriating way. I snarled at her when she took hold of my hair and tsk'ed at me, and she jumped away like I was a rabid dog.

I asked L once if it was okay to throw Hannibal at her, and I got tea thrown at my head for my trouble.

It even annoyed me even more when Matsuda gushed over her like she was a little kitten. And that everyone treated her like a movie star and not the second Kira. Even Mogi, who doesn't talk to _anyone, _seems to be phased by her upmost charm. And I was sick of it.

It helped that the only intelligent people on the force, L, Light, Beyond, and me, just couldn't stand the sight of her.

Beyond was even close to strangling her once, and because of that, he became handcuffed to me for a week. Which was not a fun week. You think it was fun? It wasn't fun. Not when he goes through all your clothes and stares at you while you sleep. Or the inflammatory comments about my ass and how much it wasn't cute. Or rearranging your bookshelf and leaving you secret messages that say, "You look like the ass end of a truck." And throwing stuff at you while you try to shower. And finding yourself awake on the balcony.

And learned things about Beyond Birthday that I could have gone my whole life without knowing.

God, he actually masturbated while I was asleep. To L. That left me scarred for life.

That Muriel he had of L in the closet. Creepy.

But whatever. I'm not talking about B right now. I'll get to him later. I'm talking about Misa. Fucking Misa.

The most horrible thing that ever could have happened to me was because of her. I went down to her floor so I could inform her that Light and L were going to have a date with her soon and to get ready for a dinner out, and she pulled me into her room, tied me to a chair, and proceeded to inflict torture that put BB's bone breaking and nail ripping to shame.

She re-dyed the bleachy bits in my hair, and washed it out and re-colored it a more natural red. Which I hated. Then she gave me a facial. Which hurt. Then she put make-up on me, did my hair, and ugh-!

I remember in the middle of it I was screaming, "HELP! L! I KNOW YOU'RE WATCHING! DON'T LEAVE ME ALONE WITH THIS WOMAN!"

I reemerged from her room and bolted towards the elevators, trying to get to my own room so I can scrub my face raw and get out of this monstrous green dress she put me in.

The intercom clicked, 'Saturday, there's no point in trying to hide your appearance. We can see you anyway. By the way, you should wait before getting out of that dress, you have also been invited to our private function this evening. We require some underprivileged information and the man we are meeting is going to need some convincing so we can get it from him. Bring Beyond with you. And make sure he doesn't try to hurt anyone."

I snarled right into the camera. That bastard! He planned this! I grumbled to myself while I made my way to BB's floor, finding him a tux and already staining his tie with Jam.

"Heh, you saw Misa already did you?" he laughed.

"Shut up before I shove my foot up somewhere unpleasant."

He smirked, looking down at me, "You look nicer than usual, but I think the bandages take away the effect."

I twirled my fingers in my hand. The nails hadn't grown back yet, and the bandages remained. Asshole.

I glared before looking away from him, "Do my nails looks like 'The ass end of a truck' than?" I sneered.

He giggled, "I thought you weren't concerned about your looks."

"I'm not," I glared, "But it doesn't mean that I want people to point out how ugly I am. I already know how I look, and I don't need you to remind me."

B seemed to find this incredibly hilarious, and commenting, "That's okay. I'm not exactly into L for his looks anyway. I prefer intelligence over appearances. Makes it more interesting that way."

He looked at me for clarification, and I just snarled and said, "I could care less either way. People in general are annoying."

"Only in general?"

"Oh yeah. Because you are not people, and you make me want to spit on puppies. And L makes me want to punch him into the wall."

Hello everyone! Very first Author's Note here. Just wanted to say thank you for the Subsciptions. But please review, because I appreciate my readers' oppinions very much. And it also helps making upload chapters faster.

So thanks again, and please review!

Also, if anyone is curious on what Saturday looks like, you can come here: http:/ celestialdeth .deviantart .com/#/d36j1vp (without the spaces) to check her out.


	7. Love Notes in my Lunch Box

I'm pretty sure all of you would have loved if I went and told the delightful tale about what happened at the dinner, but I won't. I find that remembering that night makes me want to push old ladies into oncoming traffic. I'll probably tell that story later, when I can stomach it. All I can say is that Beyond now calls me Loose Lips and that we got what we went in for. There. There's that.

Back to Beyond-this is the first time ever I had actually considered using the neck cracking technique which could kill a man in 30 seconds. I thought L was bad enough, but he literally went an up heaved my world. Fucking bastard.

So despite the fact that I pretty much let the torturing thing go- he seemed to get the idea in his head that he could push me around and do whatever the fuck he wanted. So, against my better judgment, I went and actually used the in-door gym L had put in the building. I always seemed to find time on my hands, and then I would scurry to the eleventh floor before anyone-'specially B, could follow me.

I think we can all agree that when B went out of his way to tease me again, he deserved it when I broke his goddamn elbow. But L didn't think so, and that cruel little bitch made me look after Misa for a couple days.

He knew where to hit, I can give him that.

So, in those days I was babysitting her, my general appearance improved greatly, which pissed me the fuck off, because on the off-hand chance I actually had a day off, I got hit on by more people than I would have liked. _Most_ of them were guys.

Anyway, we're going back to the fact that Beyond pretty much made me 100% sure I hated my life.

As a show of good faith, L let Light off the chain for a couple of hours after a particularly nasty fight they had about god knows what, so Light, Misa, and me (I was the designated babysitter/driver) went out on a small date while I tried my best not to puke in the bushes.

When we got back, Matsuda told me that L wanted to be handcuffed back to Light as soon as we returned. He made a show of volunteering for it, but I made him stay and watch Light instead, because so far, only me and L, (and Light) were allowed into B's room without having a projectile object being thrown at our heads.

You can see where things are going from here.

I heard muffling from the other side of the door. I knocked, yelling out that we were back. There was no answer. I waited impatiently until I heard something that sounded like L cry out, and I barged my way in, finding the door unlocked.

I wanted to die. I wanted to bleach my brain and burn my eyes.

Because I could have gone my whole life without ever seeing this. EVER.

At first I thought they were fighting. It took me half a second later to realize they were both naked. Two plus two makes four y'know. DING!

B was on top of L fucking his brains out.

Right there. Right in front of me on B's bed.

And I did the most embarrassing thing I could ever do. Because I had panicked and B was still_ going!_

I let out a girly shriek that made them both jump and grab desperately at the covers.

I unnecessarily slammed my hands over my eyes like a drama queen and sprinted down the hall.

I swear I could hear B growl, "Looks like Kira-kun is back."

It's not like I've never seen two people have sex before. I'm only human, of course I've watched porn.

But two people that I _know?_ Wrong on so many levels. It's like catching your parents having sex. That never actually happened to me, so I can't imagine what that must feel like, but I can imagine it's pretty freaking traumatizing.

So, when the two returned from their _activities_, I hissed into L's ear, "Just make sure Light doesn't find out okay? He can use him against you."

L only shrugged, before shooting me a look that said, 'I'm not stupid.' But B didn't seem to get the message.

Because not only did a few days after I caught them in the act, Beyond suddenly became very open about their relationship.

Like, when L was working through some papers, B all of a sudden leaned over L's head to give him a sloppy upside down kiss.

It was so cute I could barf.

Then Beyond wanted to hold L's hand. And Beyond was desperetly begging L for me to watch Light for a day. And Beyond joined in on Light and Misa's "dates" with L.

Like a clingy little girl.

Actually, I had never seen Beyond so scared of his life ever. Like at any minute, L was just going to drop dead in front of him.

So he showered him with kisses. He gave him small gifts. He offered to go on a walk with him.

Of course, Beyond was very violent when he wanted to be. L and him got into shouting matches often, with Light in the middle of it.

Sad to say, I felt bad for Light.

Before he lost his memories of Kira, he actually became an okay guy. You could tell that he wasn't faking anything. Not like the real bull shitter I knew, but Light was incredibly cheesy. Like he was raised on Disney movies or something.

Beyond didn't buy it for one second though. Like L, Beyond didn't trust Light at all.

And it was usually Light that was the stem of their arguments.

"You're fucking the little slut! Aren't you! AREN'T YOU!" Beyond screamed once in the middle of an argument they had when L refused to have Light removed from the chain for awhile.

In less than a second, L and B were going out in a full out brawl. Sure, when L and Light fought, it was freaking hilarious, but when L and B fought, it was like to the death.

Even Matsuda wouldn't be able to stop this, so I intervened between them, getting a punch in the face for my troubles while I separated the two.

"Both of you! Knock it off! OR so help me I WILL GO INTO YOUR ROOMS WHILE YOU SLEEP AND CASTRATE THE BOTH OF YOU!"

It was enough to make them separate, but they gave each glares that would be fatal if looks could kill.

It was always like this with them. Every fight was the end of the world. And both of them were too goddamn proud to apologize.

They were both incredibly messed up people.

The rest of the day, neither of them talked. Business as usual.

It was driving me crazy.

_I was four. He was six. He was the love of my life._

_His name was _Maĭkl. _He had shaggy blonde hair and soft blue eyes. He had freckles like me._

_He came to my house on his little bike and asked my parents if he could play with me. They always said no. Pretty soon, enough was enough and I decided to ask my brother, Sreda, to help me sneak out._

_He did, and the time I spent with Maĭkl was pretty much the happiest moments in my life. He showed me his army collection, and we played Dinosuars together. He taught me how to make the biggest, hardest mudballs ever. We drew on the sidewalks and because of him, I got the biggest scrape on my knees for the first time in my life. And I didn't mind. Maĭkl was nice to me. Maĭkl didn't tease me._

_He left me love notes in my lunch pail and he called me pretty. He gave me hugs and we stood like that forever and ever. We played connect the dots with our freckles. He stole my first kiss._

_My parents found out about it eventually, and I wasn't allowed to see Maĭkl again. I cried and threw a temper tantrum and I became the worst little girl in the world. I broke all of my mom's china and I didn't do any of the work my private tutor gave me. They were relentless. I never did see Maĭkl ever again._

_He was the one. I knew it. We were supposed to become girlfriend and boyfriend. We were supposed to get married._

_It was my parents' fault. They took my happiness from me. _

_They took away my only chance to be normal._

_I NEVER forgave them. Never._

_I hope they take their guilt to their fucking graves._

At night, I heard Beyond moving around down the hall. Our rooms were close together because L didn't really trust B completely yet.

So I heard Beyond knock on L and Light's bedroom door and heard his choking apology.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Please don't leave me."

It was really no surprise when Light came into my room knocking and with a pillow under his arms.

I laughed, getting up to pull out the makeshift bed and moving to lock the door so Light couldn't escape to do Kira-y things in the middle of the night.

Light looked extremely irritated.

"Just be happy they made you leave," I joked, before kicking Hannibal off the couch so Light could sleep.

Light grumbled under his breath, and I asked what he said.

"Who is that guy anyway?"

I frowned. That's right. Light wasn't in the loop when it came to Beyond Birthday.

"I'm afraid I'm not at liberty to divulge that to you."

"You know him then?"

Oh damn. Light _was_ smart.

"I was _aware_ of him until now. L is the only one who knows him personally."

"Obviously," Light mumbled, "Were they like this before?"

I shrugged, "Actually, I had never met L until he asked me to help him with this case."

"You never met him?" Light raised his eyebrows incredusely, "Why does he trust you?"

"Oh, he doesn't trust me. L doesn't trust anyone. He just knows I don't give a shit." I sighed, "Now, if you don't mind, can you get your ass in bed so we can sleep? Thanks."

"Can you drive?" L asked me a couple days after the whole blowing up argument, and things seemed to be a lot calmer. And Beyond stopped making it obvious to whole world that him and L were screwing each other like rabbits.

I was reading through some old English mythology on death. Most of them were The Brothers' Grimm fairy tales, but none of them showed the slightest hint of the power of death. I put the book down to take a munch out of my bagel sandwich, "Of course I can drive. My car is parked in the garage. Why?"

"We need to pick up some things, and Watari is currently incapacitated. We need someone to drive us."

"Wait," I growled, "Are we going…._shopping?"_

L blinked, "Well yes. That is the basic idea-"

"I HATE shopping, " I snarled.

There was a silence, before Light added rather obnoxiously and something I would expect from Matsuda, "But, you're a girl-"

"An _abnormal_ one," I hissed, "The last time I went shopping was when I was nineteen, and that was for my MP3 player and hair dye. I don't go out if I can't help it."

"Please Saturday," L rolled his eyes, "It's only a couple of items. And Light has been whiny about going out lately."

"I'm not whi-!"

"Fine, fine. I'll take you shopping.

"Can you turn on the radio?" Light asked from the back seat. Him and L were currently arguing the real percentage of Light being Kira, and Beyond was pretty much fiddling with everything in the car.

I liked my car. It was a piece of shit, but it was the first thing I bought after I started working. So I didn't appreciate it when Beyond was determined to destroy it.

"The radio doesn't work, I'm afraid," I frowned. Some asshole broke into my car and tried to steal it from the dashboard. I caught him and beat the living shit out of him, but he did enough significant damage to it that the radio stations never played clearly anymore.

"CD?" Light asked, hopefully, "It's too quiet in here."

Ugh, what a brat.

"I don't think you guys would like the stuff I have."

"I don't care, put one on."

"No really guys, I don't-" But Beyond was already rummaging through my capartment and found a CD I had burned a long time ago.

I wanted to stop him, but I was afraid that if I engaged into a fight with him, I might cause an accident that could very well cause our deaths.

I could already here L blaming it on Light in the afterlife, so I watched in horror as Beyond slipped the CD in.

Oh, he just had to choose _THAT_ CD, didn't he?

A bumping beat blasted against the speakers of my shitty car, while a guy sang, "_I wanna make some babies! I wanna get it on! I wanna make you horny! But I can't get it up!"_

Beyond bursted out laughing, throwing his head back and cackled.

"Oh. My. GOD. I _love this song!"_ He smirked at me and began to sing along while I blushed a deep crimson and tried to sink into my seat.

The next song wasn't better.

This time a girl sang out smoothly, slowly, making the listener a hundred percent sure they weren't mishearing.

"_9 inch heels come marching in to please a black tied dirty old man. Staring, sweating, barely caring, slurring, "Break me in." Give it up, give it up, give it up. She'll give it up, if you wanna pay up. Give it up, give it up, give it up. I know you want to…."_

"Um, Saturday?" L mumbled from the back seat, "Why do you have a CD filled with dirty music?"

"I did it to piss off Roger, okay? You happy? Shut up."

Beyond giggled insanely, "Roger must have pitched a _fit_ when he heard this! I would have loved to have seen his face!"

So, now my secret of listening to dirty songs was revealed. Nice.

And Beyond wouldn't let me take out the CD and put in another one. One that didn't have anything with sex and blowing people.

I'm a 100% certain that Beyond is out to ruin my life.

A/N: Yay! Chapter 7! I had my doubts about this one, but meh, who cares. I couldn't leave my favorite pairing out of it.

And now I want to draw BB and L doing upside down kisses. Just because I can.

Reviews make me write faster, just a small hint.

The songs Saturday has don't belong to me.

Get it up by Mindless Self Indulgence

Redlight District by Porcelain and the Tramps


	8. My Life is a Movie Script

If you currently are under the age of 21, you probably have a 61.8% chance (Suck it L) that you have consumed or at lease tasted alcohol. Here's my advice, and I know I really shouldn't be giving drinking advice to minors, but I feel that it's a part of my civic duty to warn you about certain things.

If you have the chance to get away with purchasing a wine called Strawberry Hill-DON'T BUY IT. For the love of GOD-stay away from that drink.

Not only does it taste like diluted shit, but it makes you sicker than having stomach flu on a boat. I shit you not. I can stomach most drinks, but I can't summit to Strawberry Hill.

B, of course, loved the fact that it was Strawberry, and he drank a great deal of it. Even though it tasted like a Panda's ass.

You're probably wondering why we are discussing alcohol. You will most likely not believe me when I tell you that Matsuda went out and bought a ton of drinks and proclaimed we were working too hard and needed a night off. Wait, never mind. This is Matsuda I'm talking about-of course you believe that.

No, what is unbelievable, that we actually drank that shit. And I don't remember a fucking goddamn thing.

But B-being the fucking genius that he is-decided to video tape us getting drunk off our asses.

I could go into detail about what happened on that video, but I'm lazy, so I'll just give you a condensed version. Alright, here we go.

**A Night of Assholery**

**Filmed by: BB**

**Characters:**

**L**

**Light IMAGAY**

**Beyond Birthday**

**Saturday Silence**

Int. Room-BB's bedroom

Camera pointing at L's face, already drunk, everyone chattering in the back.

L: -And then she threw cake at me, but I didn't mind. It was full of strawberries. Oh god! Are there strawberries in the bottle?

(L peers into the wine bottle looking for strawberries)

-Camera turns, facing Light lying on the bed.-

Light: What….what….what the fuck are you doing? What are you doing? What the fuck is wrong with you?

L: It's up to 20 percent.

Light: Jump off a bridge.

(My hand appears from the corner, pointing at Light's face)

Saturday: Hmmmm, you're a Kira face.

Light: My face is totally not a Kira face.

Saturday: heheheheheh, nose

(camera turns to Saturday)

Saturday: (laughing) Kira nose. That nose is full of not-Justice. HAHAHA! Hey, dudes. I…..have a boner.

(camera turns to Beyond, who is wearing a top hat.)

Beyond: ….why didn't you tell me you had a penis?

(back to Saturday)

Saturday: I call it Moby Dick. Yeah. Heh heh heh- no-it's name is….The Invader. Hey Light, can I invade your planet?

(back to Beyond)

Beyond: I call mine….the General.

(to L)

L: Mine is a candy cane.

Beyond: Yummy.

(to Light)

Light: You guys are gross. Why would you name mine is Megatron.

(to Saturday)

Saturday: (Laughing hysterically) Does that make Misa Starscream?

(Back to Beyond)

Beyond: I am a vampire I am a vampire I am a vampire I am a vampire I am a vampire-

(to L)

L: (tilting his head from side to side) You spin me right round baby right round like a record baby right round round round-

(to Light)

Light: Oh thanks a lot you douche bag that song's going to be stuck in my head.

(To Saturday)

Saturday: (shakes head) Fucking Twilight man.

(to Beyond)

Beyond: I am a vampire I am a-woah whoa whoa. Don't you mean when I go down down?

(To L)

L: Oh yeah, when have you ever gone "down,down"?

(to Beyond)

Beyond: Pickleweasal?

(to Saturday)

Saturday: Bacon bits.

(to Light)

Light: What are you guys talking about?

L: We should have a wheel chair race.

(to Beyond)

Beyond: We should steal a grocery cart.

(to Saturday)

Saturday: We should put on roller-skates and tie it to the back of a truck.

(To Light)

Light: We should play…..laser tag.

(to Saturday)

Saturday: Guys. We should. Get. Abducted by ALIENS.

(to Beyond)

Beyond: I'd bet Imagay would like that.

(to Light)

Light: heh heh heh heh, yeah. Wait…what?

(to L)

L: One time I went to the liquor store to buy some lollipops, and they were freaking condoms on a stick. I didn't even know they did that.

(to B)

Beyond: If you want, Lawli, I could give you my condom on a stick.

(to S)

Saturday: (Bursts out laughing) Condoms on sticks!

(to Light)

Light: You wanna see my condom on a stick?

(to L)

L: No.

Light: (off screen) But whhhhhy…?

(to B)

Beyond: Because you're freaking Japanese!

(to S)

Saturday: Russian people have bigger penises.

(to B)

Beyond: (flirting with L) You sexy British Bastard.

(to Light)

Light: I don't get it.

(to S)

Saturday: You're a narcissist B. And you're a bigger one L.

(to B)

Beyond: NUH UH! We all know Light wants to do himself!

(to Light)

Light: Who wouldn't?

(to S)

Saturday: (leans over to steal B's cigarettes) I don't even want to fuck myself.

(to B)

Beyond: (giggling) I fuck myself all the time.

(to L)

L: (laughs hysterically and falls off the bed) OW!

(to Light)

Light: Oh shit-hey Ryuzaki are you okay?

L: (off screen) I think I just broke my ass!

Light: (laughs hysterically)

(to S)

Saturday: This wine makes this cigarette taste like shit.

(to B)

Beyond: I think this wine is made out of piss.

(to L)

L: It tastes like a panda's ass!

(to Light)

Light: You taste Panda ass often?

(to L)

L: Do people eat that?

(to B)

Beyond: L looks like a panda.

(to S)

Saturday: Dude, you look like a panda too!

(to B)

Beyond: A sexy panda.

(to L)

L: Why is the cake always gone? (looks down at his plate.) Oh, that's why.

(to B)

Beyond: Why is the rum gone?

(to S)

Saturday: WHY IS THE RUM GONE?

(to Light)

Light: Guys, I've got a jar of dirt. (whispering) Guess what's inside it.

(to L)

L: Hey, the rum is gone.

(to B)

Beyond: We should get more rum.

(to S)

Saturday: (laughs) Aren't you drunk enough?

(to B)

Beyond: There is no such thing as too much drunk.

(to L)

L: (fake crying) I want cake!

(to Light)

Light: Guys. Let's go look for…(whispers) Big Foot.

(to S)

Saturday: (whispering) We should go stripping.

(to B)

Beyond: I don't strip. I dance exotically.

(to L)

L: There's a difference?

(To B)

Beyond: Damn straight there is! I don't take anything off. No strippin! The penis! It stays right where it is!

-video end-

I'm assuming it's because we ran out of tape. Or maybe I punched Light in the back of the head into the record button.

Light didn't handle hangovers well. I wasn't doing so well either, but I had my fair share of them.

So our morning was mostly me and B slamming doors around Light because we are cruel, cruel people.

L remembered the most out of all of us, and he assured us that, Yes, Beyond did jump on the table and started to strip. And that somehow we were able to sneak out of the building and somehow Light was able to get out of the handcuffs and he sprinted down the street while L yelled out after him. We played tag, and went to a bakery to buy some brownies or some shit.

And we got wigs. Don't ask me why. But we bought wigs.

I oddly looked like Beyond with my wig on, and now it's resting safely on my dresser.

We went to the park apparently, played football, stole a grocery cart, ran around a parking lot, then we were able to find our way back and pass out together in my room while watching the Exorcist. Actually, I remember that, because I don't recall a time when a girl spitting pea soup to be so horrifying.

Coffee soon became my number one friend, and we were all wolfing down cups of it to get rid of the dull aches in our head.

When we found the video, we watched it safely away from the others, and me and Beyond found it to be the funniest thing in the world.

"We should put this on youtube," I commented, while Light shot me a nasty look. Beyond agreed with me.

"Light's new nickname is Kira face."

"And you're Sexy Panda."

"And L is totally Condom Lollipop."

"And Saturday is Moby Dick."


	9. Until We Close Our Eyes for Good

Waking up in the morning is hard.

Especially if you're someone like me, that likes to stay up until three in the morning watching Super Jail or Horror movies from the 1970s, and going on the web to buy more ironic t-shirts and jeans.

Ergo, mornings are difficult for me, as I am neither an early bird nor a morning riser. And I refuse to speak until I've had my morning coffee mixed with tons of vanilla creamer and energy drinks, and hopefully some toast with eggs.

Even so, it astounds me to see Light and L already in the investigation room, dressed and awake and ready to go, while I stumbled in with my tangles hair, a long sleeve, and blue Transformers Boxer shorts.

I'm onto my third cup of sludge at the moment, nearly crawling over to the couch and diving into my Death Mythology books.

These books were the most interesting things in my day-well-until Beyond woke up and started wreaking havoc again.

Death was interesting. Actually, my favorite so far was an American script for a TV show called 'Dead Like Me' where it explained that Death escaped from a jar when a Frog broke it. Not very factual, but entertaining nonetheless.

So far, most of the death stories all centered around one thing-which death won't come calling until it was your time to depart. No longer and no less.

There were only a few stories-mostly Japanese- that told of Gods of Death-Shinigami-that caused death before our time. They were not Death-they just caused it. The Egyptians were the best when it came to death. They had millions of stories-millions-about the afterlife.

There was Anubis-the death god that decided if a soul were to go to heaven or hell based on the weight of your sins. Much like St. Peter from the Catholic religion. And if Anubis decided you were not worthy to join the gates of heaven, you were fed to Ammit, a monster that will eat your mind and leave you in eternal darkness.

When this was over-I was SO going to be an expert on this death thing.

"_I was walking down the street When out of the corner of my eye, I saw a pretty little thing approaching me, She said I never seen a man who look so all alone, could you use a little company? If you pay the right price, your evening will be nice, and can you go and send me on my way? I said you're such a sweet young thing, Why'd you do this thing to yourself? She looked at me and this is what she said There ain't no rest for the wicked, money don't grow on trees. I got bills to pay, I got mouths to feed, there ain't nothing in this world for free. I know I can't slow down, I can't hold back though you know I wish I could. Oh no there ain't no rest for the wicked, until we close our eyes for good….."_

"Can you pick up your phone already?" Light asked irritably from behind me.

My phone had vibrated itself off the table, and I was looking desperately for it under the couch.

"Yeah, yeah! I know! Geeze!"

"Hmm, this song annoys Light-Kun?" L held a spoon to his mouth, "It goes up by 1.3%"

"What!"

"Found it! Hello?"

There was giggling on the other end, and I knew immediately that it was another prank caller. I really needed to change my number.

"H-hey….ha…have you checked the children?"

Oh good. That joke. I actually had a response to that one.

I chuckled back with a creepy voice of my own, before saying huskily back into the receiver.

"_I killed them."_

The kid at the other end instantly went, "WHAT?" before I hung up on him.

"Another prank caller?" L called out to me from his desk, "I'm worried. You really need to change your number."

"Nah, that's the only way I could keep in contact with my sisters, wherever the hell they are now. And it's too much fun to mind fuck with little kids."

"You're an evil little woman."

"Why do you get so many prank calls anyway?" Beyond mumbled from the couch, his arms behind his head with his eyes closed, "I wish I was that popular."

"No you don't. The reason I get so many is because some asshole I dated a while back posted my number on Craigslist as a prostitute after I dumped him and it looks like he hasn't taken it down yet."

"Whoa, you date?" Beyond cackled, waving his cigarette in my face. Never had I wanted one so badly. I quit two years ago, but shit has a way of coming back to haunt you, "Wanna go out some time? But I'm going to have to warn you, I may get you pregnant on the first date. RIGHT LAWLI?" He called out to L over my head and in retaliation, L called him something in German and B paled. More so than he usually is.

"Nah, I gave up men for awhile. Maybe after this, I'll switch to woman. They're prettier. Well, except for Light."

Light responded by calling me something in Japanese.

"Anata ga torōru!"

"Neko no o shiri no haha no shōnen." I mumbled under my breath, which made Light seize up in shock.

"You speak Japanese?"

"Surprised? I can speak English well enough, and Russian, which is my native tongue, but I'm also fluent in French, Danish, Romanian, Japanese, and Galician. And by the way, the next time you say something behind my back, expect a foot up your ass."

"I apologize Saturday-chan-"

"Really? You want to use 'Chan' on Saturday? I'd use kun if I were you."

I face palmed myself, "Oh my god. I'm never going to understand honorifics."

"How did you escape dying?" I asked Beyond once, mostly because I was curious, and I was also bored. Nothing had been happening in the last couple of days, besides the fact that L was suspicious of the Yotsuba group now.

So while L and Light were busy making little plans and I was trying my best not to check out Wedy's ass, me and Beyond were mooching around the kitchen.

"Why do you care?" Beyond smirked, "I'm here aren't I? That's all the matters."

"Pffffffft," I rolled my eyes, "I doubt that. L has been wrapping his head around it ever since we found out you were alive. The only reason he took this case was because we heard from the asylum that Kira killed you. I was at your god damn funeral for fuck's sakes!"

"He did….?" Beyond smiled widely, "He took this case because of me?" Beyond tipped the entire contents of his Jam down his throat. "Aint' that interesting? I'm really happy that I faked it now." He went to the fridge for another jar of Jam, "You were at my funeral? Did you dance on my grave?"

I snorted, "No, I didn't dance on your grave. M was pretty depressed about everything, but everyone else looked like they wanted to spit on your coffin."

"Was Lawli there? Did he cry?" His grin was too crazy for my liking, so I backed away, "Uh….yes, he was. I didn't know it was L than, but I remember him being there. He left roses. Now can you get out of my personal space?"

Beyond moved away from me, before settling back to his new jar of Jam and he began to explain to me how he did it. How he managed to beat Kira.

_I was actually surprised at how easy it was to fake a death. When criminals began to die, I knew it could only be a matter of time before this mysterious Kira came calling for me. So I did the only thing I could do. Die before Kira could kill me._

_So, I set fire to my roommate, (who on earth was stupid enough to give ME a roommate?) and even though it bought me a week of solitary, I collected enough pills in my juice box to tip them down my recovered roommate's throat. (His name was Leonard, I believe, which was a shame considering that I did like him). He died of a heart attack. I then switched our clothes and butchered his hair. It worked because now that he had burns, he looked like me. And luckily enough, he had natural black hair as well. They took Leonard's dead body away and a week later, Leonard's parole came through and I was free._

"That's it. That's your amazing story?" I mumbled towards him, "Shit, I could have thought of that."

"It wasn't much of a plan, considering my lack of resources and time. But it worked together nicely, did it not?"

"Yeah, sure," I inched away from him, "Just remind me not to trust you, _at all_, in the future.

"Now tell me something about you."

"Well, what do you want to know? Ask me."

"Hmmm," Beyond pretended to ponder his question, "What happened to your family?"

I grumbled, "Oh, big shocker. Everyone wants to know what happened to the orphan's family."

"My mother died in a train crash, my father was mugged and killed. Now you."

"Auugrrh, fine. It's not anything unusual. My family was murdered."

"How old were you?"

"Six."

"How much of it do you remember?"

"Not that much," I took a sip from my energy drink, "Bits and pieces mostly. Sometimes I dream about what happened. But I can't remember faces."

Beyond leaned in close to me before smirking, "Liar."

"Okay, fine. I remember everything from that traumatizing night, and it will forever scar me and haunt me until the end of my days. Happy?"

"Yes," Beyond laughed, "Did they ever catch the guy who did it?"

"No," I mumbled, "Sonovabitch got away. L bribed me here y'know. He promised me that if I helped him with this investigation, he'd help me find the guy."

"Oh, so it _wasn't_ your staggering intelligence that got you on the team?"

"Up yours ass hole.

"Okay, so everything makes sense up until the fact that you said he was never caught. You had, what?  
Eight, nine people in your family? That's a lot of evidence to be left behind."

"Says Mr. I-wipe-ever-fingerprint-in-the-house-after-I-murder-someone-because-I'm-crazy. The guy was a professional, genius. And he didn't get everyone for your information. My eldest brother and my older twin sisters are still alive y'know."

Beyond giggled insanely.

"What?" I asked, "What? What's so funny?_ What's so funny?"_

"Professional. Heeheeheeheehee, professional? A hitman? Your family must have been important. _Very important._ Is that why you don't have files? No birth certificate? No SSN? You let something _slip_ little Subbota.

I kept my body from shaking, because it was true. I did slip, but it's not as if it was a big slip. I could care less about what had happened to me. It's been 15 years. And it's not as if my secret even _mattered_ anymore.

But it was still a secret. One that I harbored since I was old enough to talk.

"It isn't important," I finally said. "My past isn't much of a concern anymore. Lives don't hang in the balance. It's not as if this information can be used against me. But it's my secret. My family's secret. And I'm keeping it until you give me a reason otherwise. Either way, I hope you have fun figuring out what it is."


	10. Smoke and Mirrors

We had all learned the hard way that Misa should be allowed to do what she wanted. And seeing as I was the only female in the entire building, When Misa exclaimed she was bored, I was the one sent down to her room to entertain her for a few hours. I had dreaded it at first, but the thing about Misa is that she's pretty adaptable. She knew I didn't like to speak of trivial things, so most of the time, she asked me about the things I liked. So I told her. Books and movies and the like, and once she suggested we watched movies I enjoyed, but she soon learned not to do it again. Although it was very entertaining to watch her, I had learned that horror movies may not be the best form of entertainment. Actually, she was the only one that was fun to watch horror movies with, because B wouldn't swallow his pride to watch it with me, and L and Light were just plain annoying. I don't want to know that when you hit someone in the jugular in a particular angle it doesn't shoot out that much blood, I just want to appreciate the effects. And L is not fun to watch movies with. At all. I'm never,_ ever_ watching movies with him because he is an ending ruiner. He ruins movie ends. I think he might have been able to see the end of the _Sixth Sense_, which would be freaking amazing because every time I met someone who claimed that they knew Bruce Willis was a ghost, I knew they were full of _shit._

So, on this particular morning, I was once again forced into Misa's room for company, and she took one look at me and claimed that I needed a new dye job, and I just shrugged, because she did seem really excited about the hair dye she bought. So, while I sat and basicly became Misa's giant Barbie Doll, I saw the last thing I expected to see on her coffee table. A chess board.

When I pointed it out to her, she sighed and said she was teaching herself how to play, and that she even got L to get her a book on stategies. When I asked for what, she let out a tinkling laugh and said she was learning it for Light.

That's when I realized that I actually liked Misa Amane.

So, after she was done coloring my hair, I promised that later I would play a game with her so she could practice, and she became estatic. But first, I would have to go on an unsavory trip to the book store because I ran out of books to read. When I told L about it, he looked at me incredulously and said, _'You read 138 books in three weeks?'_ which is pretty fucking insulting. I'm smart. I like to read. It's not rocket science.

Watari was busy that day apparently, and L told me that if I wanted books, I would have to get them myself, which I didn't mind. I loved bookstores. And then I made the decision to walk.

Big Mistake.

BIG MISTAKE.

Like, the biggest mistake in the history of big mistakes that are so big they have to ride the failboat in and it just couldn't contain that big of a fail.

Because while I was walking back, it had started to rain.

And while it rained, I noticed that read stinks were running down my head.

I ran. No, I _sprinted_. I was actually hoping over cars. I was like a gazelle. I am very, very gazelle like when I'm afraid.

I reached the building, hammered on the door for Watari to let me in, through the books down, and dashed to my room. I had to knock B to the floor when he was in my way in the hall.

When I reached the bathroom, I grabbed a towel in vain hope to salvage the mess.

But it was no use.

The hair dye was victourious.

I took one look into my mirror, and screamed.

I screamed and screamed until I started choking and then I screamed some more.

I heard the others come crashing in, probably expecting something Kira-related to happen to me, and when I tried to shut the door on them, it was too late.

Aizawa, Matsuda, and Beyond, who looked very unhappy because I had ran into him, stared at me in shock. Mouth open, eyes bugging out, silent, utter shock.

This was the first time I had ever felt like crying in front of people. Which is something I just don't do.

And Beyond said the last thing you should say to a girl in this situation.

He pointed at me and shrieked, "_Oh. My. GOD. _Your hair looks like an_** Easter Egg.**_"

That's when my resolve broke and I lunged forward, tackling Beyond to the ground, a snarl ripping out from my throat as if I was some banshee summoned up from the flames of hell.

Because my hair?

_IT WAS PINK!_

"You behavior is unacceptable. I understand that B is not the most sensitive person in the world, but this doesn't mean you had any right to do what you did."

"It's not like I killed him."

"You broke his nose, his arm, and now he's unconscience."

"HE TORTURED ME."

"And don't think that he won't be punished justly for his crimes. Beyond is a criminal, I'm not blind to that. But I don't want you to add any more to the list of misdeamors that you already have."

"Oh right. Sure."

"Excuse me?" L's voice dropped dangerously low. This was not regular L angry. Regular angry got you glares, a couple of insults, and some kicks if you were Light. But dangerous angry L has been known to make people disappear from the face of the planet.

"You heard me. Let's pretend for one second that you aren't flesh and blood like the rest of us. You expect me to believe that once this case is over, you're just going to dump his ass back in a cell and carry on your merry way. I call _bullshit."_

"Saturday…"

"Fine, I'll stop. I know I have anger issues and Beyond is a douche. But don't sit there and pretend that you're being fair. Because you're not."

I marched towards the door, and before I left the room altogether, I turned and glared, "And incase you can't understand the magnitude of my fury, imagine some crazy hairdresser dyed your hair Easter Egg Pink. Chew on t_hat!"_

Apperently, my hair issues weren't quite as pressing as everything else we had to deal with, so my hair simply had to wait. I had to deal with the fact that, yes, I had pink hair. It helped some that it wasn't too pink, more like an orche, a creamy orange mixed with strawberry. But still, pink. And because I realized that I did indeed have low self-image issues, I retired to my room for the investigation. After three days, I finally stopped being the little hermit I was and sulked out of my cave. I needed to file the reports to L on the information that may be useful.

And I saw the last thing I had expected to see. In big black bold letters that rose a mile high.

L was kissing Light. L was kissing Light. **L **was kissing **Light.** And it wasn't the other way around. And it was sickening because they thought they were so sneaky, kissing when they though no one was around and theyr wouldn't get caught.

It was a chaste kiss. A sweet kiss. A shy one. Kisses that you give to people you love. Kisses that _**L**_ should be giving to the guy he was _dating, _like maybe, _BEYOND BIRTHDAY._

I rapped my knuckles against the wall, and the two jumped apart as if they were on fire. They gazed at me, shocked looks on their faces, because they had been caught.

I walked over to them, jaw set, and bumping into L deliberately, hissing as I went by.

"If you don't tell them, I _will."_

Because Beyond and Misa, no matter how much they pissed me off, and annoyed me, did not deserve this.

What really burns me is the fact that everyone pretended nothing was wrong. I had avoided those two like the plague, glaring bullets into them.

And when Beyond was finally up and about, I had wanted to puke. He hung off L, kissing him often, playingly pulled him into conversations, and held onto him for hours.

His face fell when L snatched his hand back from B's hold, when L flinched with every kiss, and straight out put him down for asking if he wanted to go on a small walk.

I watched as B began to fall.

And then Beyond just stopped showing up in the investifation room altogether.

I found him in the kitchen one day, devouring a jar of strawberry jam, and the jars scattered around him told me that he had been gourging himself all morning. This worried me, because only a few days after I first caught B and L doing the 'Horizontal Shoe Shuffle' a few months earlier, did I discover that Beyond was capable of eating other food besides his precious jam.

Now he was shoveling hand full's into his mouth.

He heard me walk in, and his head shot up.

He looked at me with sad eyes, and said nothing.

He _knew._ He knew what was happening, he knew but he couldn't say anything because he had no proof.

I wanted to tell him. I wanted to. I really did. But I couldn't.

I had not logical reason for not telling him, it was more of an emotional impulse, and I realized why normal people had problems like this. Feelings and all that other shit sure get in the way.

And then I noticied something else.

Misa knew too. But like B, she said nothing, because she had no proof, but she knew.

I saw it, when I went back to visit her in her room, to play that chess game I promised. She was put down at her loss, but I assured her that it was fine. I had been playing all my life. At least she never asked which piece could move where.

But sometimes, she dropped that sunny disposition of hers and she could seem downright depressed.

I went looking for him then. He wouldn't leave his room, and his room was the only one that didn't have any cameras. Because no one wanted to know what Beyond did when he was alone.

I stormed in, finding his messy bedroom messy. Empty jam bottles laid across the floor. His bed unmade, papers scattered everywhere. A laptop blinked lazily on a dirty desk. The usual greeting, "It better be you, L, and you better be naked. If you're neither, get out," didn't ring out. And a crash rang out in the empty room, and I darted to B's bathroom. He hunched over the sink, the mirror broken, shards scattered aross the floor, Blood intermingling amoung the glass.

"What are you doing? What the fuck are you doing?" I snarled in surprise, going to him and grabbing his wrists.

"Get off!" He flung his arms, and I fell back, and I went back to him, shaking him by the shoulders.

"What is wrong with you? Why are you doing this?"

He hit me again, and I punched him across the face. He fell back with an 'OOF!', and then he lunged at me again.

"Beyond!" I squacked, "Are you crazy? Are you-"

And he fisted his hands in my shirt and pulled me close.

I felt his lips come crashing down onto mine.

His skin was cold. His mouth tasted like strawberries, big surprise there, but there was something else. Alchohol maybe, but faint, and something sweet. Something I couldn't name. His kiss was hard, and bruised. The only way he knew how to kiss. By hurting. My mouth was open, from gasping, but he kept his tongue to himself, and I can feel his cold breath in my mouth. He was soft, he was gentle, and he was _so not the answer._

I squirmed under his grasp, finally wiggling myself away from his grasp. I backed away, and wiped my mouth with the end of my hand, trying to get the _taste_ of him off of me.

"WHAT ARE YOU-MMPH!"

He dived back in again, desperate this time, pushing me back against the sink, then he was soft again, hands on my face, trying to comfort me, to coax me, into what, I had a pretty good idea.

I kneed him in the stomach again, and he gasped, and then lunged again. I jumped back, my legs hitting the tub, and I fell, grapping the shower curtain and pulling it down with me. When Beyond closed in, I held up the curtain as a shield. He struggled against it, before stepping back and ripping it from my hands. He joined me in the tub, my legs hanging over the edge as he climped in, and dived again.

A brief peck this time, and I pushed him away, his smile cracking over his insane face.

"Help me get back at him," he whispered, "_Help me get back at him."_

"You're insane."

"Maybe," he giggled, "But he is, and you are too. We're insane people, living in an insane world. What are you? A Jaded Misanthropic. A girl with pink hair. You're Saturday Silence. You're little Subbota Molchanie. An orphan girl from Wammy's House, trying to pretend that you're not as smart as I know you are. Trying to pretend you're not as beautiful as I know you can be. And what am I? I'm backup. I'm B. I'm the mirror. I have no identity. I have no personality. I am not a person. I am a shadow. I am NOTHING WITHOUT HIM."

I inched away from him. He looked about ready to cry.

"You don't understand. He needs to be punished. I can't hurt his little whore. I can't touch him. But I can punish Lawli. He needs to know how much it _hurt-"_ he leaned to kiss me again, but I turned away and he caught my cheek.

"He hurt me. I love him and he hurt me. And I can't just let him go. I can't. He's everything. He's my life. But he needs to learn his lesson."

His hands on my face now, forcing a kiss, and I keep myself tight lipped.

Because I don't want him. I just don't. Because someone like me, and someone like him, we just didn't go together. We weren't like peanut butter and jelly, or cookies with milk, or cheese and macaroni.

He was relentless, and I pulled away.

"Get off," I hissed, "Get off. Get off. _Get off. GET OFF!"_ I shrieked, "This is your problem. Not mine! Don't drag me into this. I'm not going to become a fucked up mess like you over this! I have feelings! I'm only human! Go fuck Misa! Or fucking Matsuda!"

"I don't care," he snarled, "I don't care about your feelings."

And he pulled me out of the tub, and we stood, as if we were hanging in the air, and his hands brushed strands of my hair away from my face.

And he kissed me again. And when he pulled away, he leaned into my ear and whispered to me like a lover, "I need to get. _back. At. HIM."_

And he kissed me with a passion. A passion that I'm sure that only L has ever felt. He titled my head back and I was left breathless, and it was convincing enough that I could almost trick myself into believing that he meant it.

**A/N: I'll admit, I was a little hesitant to go on with this chapter. I hate to be accused of writing an OC when I believe that Saturday is the furthest from it. I tried not to bring romance that revolved around my character, but I hope I countered that romance with the fact that both B and S know that if anything happened, it really wounld't mean anything. But now that I have decided to post this version of Chapter 10, I feel that it is vital to the story line that this happened. And if any of you feel a little woozy from reading something like this, let me assure you that this will be the last time this happens. The next chapter may be a little emotional, but soon I'll get it back on track with where I want this to go.**

**So I hope all of you can forgive me of this and we can all move on.**

**Love and Peace, CelestialDeth**


	11. Minus Clothes Pray to God You Don't X

I don't think it's too far off the mark when I say I had a flying shit attack when I woke up the next morning.

Remember when I said that I didn't take to mornings too well? When I finally blinked my eyes open, every part of me ached and I had a fucking huge ass headache. I immediately groaned, thinking to myself that I had gotten drunk off my ass again, and I mentally kicked myself because I always promised myself that I would never drink again.

But when I realized that I wasn't woozy, and that I didn't have a horrendous after taste in my mouth, and that there was a arm slung over my naked waist in a death grip did I realize that I wasn't drunk.

I was just incredibly stupid.

I shrieked, and the messy black hair that was hiding under the covers shot up and when his arm loosened his grip, I immediately shot away and landed on the floor with a THUD!

My boxers were still on a secure, thank god, but I was missing a shirt and (gulp) bra, and I snatched the blanket off the bed to give myself what small dignity I had left.

Beyond looked at me with an irritated frown, his hair a rat's nest, and oh god, where those hickies on his neck? _Why couldn't I remember anything?_

I looked under my bed for my missing clothes which seemed to be lost forever, and I looked back at  
B, and I'm sure my face was flushing, bright as a Christmas ornament, and he laughed.

"WHERE ARE MY PANTS?" I growled at him.

"Probably with mine," he snickered, "Why don't you take that stick up your ass and get back in?"

"Like hell I will! You don't touch me ever! Get away from me!"

He grabbed hold of my wrist while I flailed, and he hauled me back into his bed and I kicked and screamed, squawking like a very angry bird.

"Oh, stop being a drama queen. You didn't even let me get past second base last night."

"You mean we didn't-you didn't-"

"What? You don't remember? I'm insulted." He smirked.

"I'm probably repressing the memory because it was so horrible!" I tried to get away. Get away from that face. That stupid face. Oh god. I let him see me naked. I saw him naked. I was hyperventilating, I wanted to get away. He saw me. He saw me. He saw me with all of my insecurities and my weaknesses.

He saw everything. He saw too much of me.

"Shhh," he chuckled, "It's early, and you don't want to wake everyone else up, do you?"

I immediately quieted, my imagination supplying me with a scene of L and Light bursting into the room and seeing….this. Oh god. L was going to _murder _me.

"Let me go," I whispered.

"Not yet," He sighed, pulling both of us down onto the bed and nuzzling into my arm, "It's too early. Go back to sleep."

"I can't," I hissed.

"You're shaking. Relax."

"I c_an't,"_ I hissed again, "I'm not-fuck-I don't _do _this sort of thing."

"What? Fool around? It's not like we're fucking. Look, see? My hands are just on your waist. I won't move them."

"I don't want them on me _at all,"_ I growled, "Besides. I thought you were into-y'know."

"Gay?" He chuckled, "I only like Lawli. So I guess you can say I'm asexual, or bisexual, or L-sexual." He laughed at that, "Besides, you swing both ways too."

"You're a goddamn womanizer is what you are. I see you flirting with girls when we go out." I huffed. It was true. Even though L and Beyond could pretty much be twins, it was obvious who the better looking one was. Girls hung off of B almost as much as they hung off of Light. Me and L were gnomes.

"Jealous?"

"Hardly. The girls you flirt with are twats. Japanese doesn't do it for me."

"I was talking about _me,"_ he pouted.

"Oh. Uh…no. If you haven't noticed, I re_ally_ don't like you."

"Aw, that's not what it looked like last night."

I froze in his grasp and tried to shift away, "Okay, you know what? Fuck you. You were an emotional wreck and you came onto me, you fucking psycho. And it's not my fault. Being a virgin for twenty-one years didn't exactly desensitize me."

"Fine fine. I get it. Anyone can make you a horny mess. I understand."

I smacked him across the head and snarled, shutting my eyes and trying to block his voice.

"Hey, if it's any consolation, you were pretty entertaining for a virgin. Besides the fact that you were pretty much freaking out the whole time."

"UGH! It's not like I'm fucking celibate or something! I've fooled around with other people before."

He chortled, leaning in for a small kiss on my neck, "Aw, and here I was thinking I was your first fling."

"Fuck. You."

"Hey, I was waiting on you. But you were pretty amandment about keeping your panties on."

"Don't you ever say those words in front of me! I wear BOXERS you dick nugget!"

He laughed, "Oh wow. Dick nugget? Really? How many other insults do you have in that little feather head?"

"Plenty," I snarled, "There's the usual motherfucker, son of a bitch, but there's also cock bite, turd fucker, sperm dumpster, festering sack of whore, dip shit, pussy, cunt, wanker, ass muncher, faggot, mother humper, fuck face, ass wipe, whore face, cock sucker, shit head, shit stain, and a lot more that I can't think of at the moment."

"Fuck, all you need is a penis don't you?"

"Sometimes I wish I did. Sex wouldn't seem so fucking scary."

"Dominance issues?"

"Hell, I'd like to see you try it."

"I'm a top," Beyond smiled and sighed, "I have never submitted to anything."

"Me neither."

Silence.

"So, I guess this relationship won't work out huh? If neither of us wants to get fucked."

"Oh shut up. If anything, this is a fake relationship. A farce. Which ends today."

"You're breaking up with me?" B fake pouted.

"Yes. When you let me go."

"FUCK! It's still early. Go to sleep."

"I can't! I mean, I seriously can't. I usually can't sleep without music. And now I'm all awake."

"Oh god, you're fucking high maintenance aren't you? More power to the ladies that date you then." B sighed, "Here, move over you baby. I'll turn the radio on and you can listen to your shit."

"No, I want to listen to your music. What do you have on here?" I switched on his CD player and he tried to stop me, "Get your dirty hands off my shit!" he growled.

When the music began to play, I snorted to myself. _"Foster the People? Seriously?_"

"What? You have something against Pumped up Kicks?"

"Um no, I just can't see you listening to Foster. Seems too mellow for you. I imagined you listened to a lot of Slipknot and Cage the Machine."

"Well fuck you ma'am. I actually thought you listened to a lot of angry girl bands like Avril Lavigne or whatever the fuck her name is. Didn't see you listening to music about Prostitutes blowing people."

"Porcelain and The Tramps was a phase okay? And they don't sing about sex _sometimes_, and for your information, I'm actually a fan of Priscilla Ahn."

"I don't care to ask who that is. Go back to sleep okay? We'll talk about how much I'm going to make Lawli regret fucking with me when we get up, okay?"

"Bossy," I groaned, "Well than, shut up. And stop touching me."

"_All the other kids with the pumped up kick, You better run, better run, outrun my gun…All the other kids with the pumped up kicks, You better run, better run, faster than my bullet."_

As it turns out, me and B didn't actually argue about how far we were going to take this. He agreed not to touch me unless L was around, or anyone we thought would tell L, like Misa and Matsuda. Besides that, if he decided to touch me, I would beat him within an inch of death, and then some.

We would also start rooming together, but we would keep that to ourselves and let L forgive it out himself. I would just move all my shit in there, and we would pretend we were doing things we weren't supposed to be doing while we were actually probably going to be fighting or watching reruns of Super Jail.

And we would have to go on fake dates. Which sort of pissed me off, but Beyond assured me that it would just be us wandering around for a few hours before heading back.

The last thing was leaving obvious marks on each other, and me wearing his clothes. Which I did not like, at all, but he made me pinky promise into doing it, and there was also an agreement of buying me socks, so I agreed. I don't know how, but he found out about my sock thing.

On our first fake date, he made me wear something nice, courtesy of Misa, which included a ridiculous amount of black, but to my delight, we actually went around picking up girls. Well, mostly it was him trying to teach me how to pick up girls while he flaunted himself. He knew that I was still questioning my blatant sexuality, but he didn't push it. In the end, I met a very cute girl named Alistair. She was French and she had masses of rich brown hair that smelt of sweet peas. She couldn't pronounce her R's right and while I was teaching her how to pronounce it, I ended up making out with her for twenty minutes under a stair case until B found us and scared the living shit out of me. I got her number but I knew I was never going to call. Love em and leave em. That's me. Even though I didn't want to.

When we got back, we didn't have to leave fake marks because our lady friends had no problems with mauling us. When me and B snuck back into our room, we laughed ourselves sick because of L's reaction to a Texas sized hicky on Beyond's shoulder.

And that's how life went for me. I was having a fake relationship with a man that I hated, which is sad because this is the closest I really ever had with someone. And it was because we knew what to expect from each other. We both knew what the other's intentions were, and that was okay with me. At least he didn't leave me guessing.

Sometimes he would come in angry and pissed because L was acting indifferent, and there I was. And he had no qualms with using me. And I reacted violently to his advances. I broke a chair slamming it over his head. He shoved my face into a mirror. We beat the living shit out of each other. He kicked me in the mouth and chipped a tooth. I gave him so many bruises he looked like a fucking Dalmatian. I had aches in places I didn't know existed. He broke an ankle. I broke a finger.

The others didn't say anything when we would leave a room looking as if we just crawled out from a World War 3 war zone. But we didn't care. Our fights were just something mutual for the both of us. He released his sexual frustration through his fists. I took out my hate of the world on his body. And seriously, if were actually a couple, we'd probably fuck each other just to see who would hurt the other most. Hell, Foreplay would be like a death match.

It was sick. It was twisted. And sometimes I would wonder how I got myself into these kind of situations and then when I'm lying in our bed in self loathing he would look over at me and ask if I wanted to play Silent Hill and all is forgiven.

It was early one morning, and the alarm had gone off because the day before L had asked us to get in early for a special meeting. I didn't want to change, mostly because I was lazy but also because I was feeling a bit patronizing. I tried to get out, but Beyond does this annoying thing where he clings to you in the middle of the night like a baby and refuses to let go.

And well, he was growing more attached than usual so I kissed him, a small experimental one and he finally sighed and let go, taking his fingers out of my hair and when I walked out the door, I froze.

L and Light, at that exact moment, were walking in front of my door, fully dressed and ready to go. And I stood there because L was giving me a very nasty look. Like he just smelled something particularly disgusting.

And then, my mind decided to realize that I was indeed wearing Beyond's famous long sleeve and his red boxers. Boxers, I'm sure, that L has seen before.

I hissed at him, called him a hypocritical bastard and made my way to the investigation room.

**A/N: So there's B's and Saturday's relationship in a nut shell I guess. If anyone is asking at the end of this chapter that I haven't made clear: No. They have not had sex, and I don't think they will ever have sex. If anything, they're friends. And we all have these kinds of friends. You know the ones I'm talking about. The kind were you kind of hate them but can't stand to not have them there and when they do something stupid you pretend not to know them? And vice versa. **


	12. Tuesdays, Thursdays, and No One's

There is only so much emotional capacity I can take. All my life there has been one constant. Hatred. I can only hate, hate people around me, hate people I know, hate myself.

Beyond showed me other things besides hate, or maybe we were showing each other. We were hateful people, and that's why we could stand each other. But he just doesn't give a shit about anyone else, even himself, while I just hated.

We were singing when it happened.

_You hit me once I hit you back you gave a kick I gave a slap you smashed a plate over my head then I set fire to our bed you hit me once I hit you back you gave a kick I gave a slap you smashed a plate over my head then I set fire to our bed_

Is it hopeful sounding to say that was our song?

Matsuda called us over the phone; we were in my room at the time.

"Hey S! Stop dancing with B! Get in here, we have an emergency!"

And then L over the phone, "Matsuda, stop being overdramatic,"

So we shut the radio off and made our way to the investigation room where the others looked expectantly at us. The TV was on the monitors.

"Hey guys, what's the big-"

"Shh! Listen!" Matsuda exclaimed, and I turned to watch the mile high television.

"- And in other news, two upstanding women, "The Silence Twins' as they are known in the fashion world. Were found dead in their apartment complex last night in New York. At first thought to be killed by Kira, police have confirmed that this was a murder performed with highly fatal toxins injected into the skin. The women, 30 year old Tuesday and Thursday Silence were both fashion designers. While police are speculation on who may have committed this crime, authorities are also looking for the twins' extended family, who seem nowhere to be found. Police are now looking for the whereabouts of 21 year old Saturday and 32 year old Wednesday Silence. Please call this number if you have any information concerning them. Now let's turn to Dallas for the weather-"

The TV muted, and L said something. But it fell on deaf ears.

Tuesday. Thursday.

Vtornik. Chetverg.

Dead.

Like Mother and Father. Dead.

Like Friday. Dead.

Sunday. Dead.

Monday. Dead.

Now Tuesday and Thursday. Dead.

We're all fucking DEAD.

I was frozen in place; my feet had grown roots into the floor. I was floating. Neither here nor there. Trapped in a nonexistent bubble. I don't want to wake up. I don't want to leave. I want to continue to lie. To pretend. I want to get away from the never ending nightmare.

Someone was shaking me. Who was it? Who was trying to wake me up? I don't want to wake up. I want to dream forever. Who was that?

Matsuda. Oh duh. That idiot doesn't know when to quit.

He looked hurt. Opps, must have said that out loud.

I came crashing down.

"-urday? Saturday? Saturday?"

Still shaking.

"Are you okay?"

Silence choked, ripped from the throat.

"I'm fine."

"Would Saturday like a day off to collect her thoughts? Actually, I think we all deserve a break. Everyone, you are excused for the day until Tomorrow." L announced.

Light had been holding his hand before we walked int.

I wanted to spit fire.

I grabbed B's wrist. I wanted to get away. I wanted to scream.

He wanted to know what was wrong.

I shook my head.

Soon enough, we were back in our room, and he asked again.

I looked at him with smirking eyes.

"I want to do something _BAD."_ I smiled, "I want to break the law."

He had no problem agreeing with me.

I firmly believe that there is more footage of me flipping off cameras than anything else.

I don't know why I had thought to do that, maybe I wanted to work myself up to the real bad stuff. I've always been a bit of a bad-ass. Actually, I just like to tell myself that because of the prison thing. But enough of that.

There were over eight hundred cameras in the building. That's a lot of cameras. And a lot of middle fingers.

There were a lot of things to do in that building when you're bored and on the brink of insanity. Like jumping on beds and calling Amane on the phone and asking her what kind of pizza she would like.

And the underground tennis court L though we didn't know about, which we completely flooded with marbles. And when I say 'we', I mean Beyond and me. He shares the blame with me. But the jam thing in the kitchen was all him.

The intercom bit was me, but I'm pretty sure I knew better then to play the _Natalie Portman Uncensored Rap_ over the speakers. Oh, I knew it was wrong, but I did it anyway.

And well, the practical jokes just kept getting worse, but I couldn't help it. I was going stir-crazy. Like, _The Shining_ crazy. With the ball room delusions and ax wielding maniacs. It wasn't until we started chucking Tennis balls at each other did L decide we were in a desperate need of a day outside.

And then there were a lot of things we did. Things that I cannot fathom. Things that is idiotic in hindsight but actually quite hilarious.

We raced in grocery carts and banged up a couple cars, shoplifted some sweets from around the corner and set a trashcan on fire. We traumatized small children by going to the park and telling them they were adopted. And that their parents were feeding them McDonalds so once they were fat they were going to feast on them. And I slammed an ice cream cone into a little boy's eyes. And stared at teenage girls walking towards us and when they turned to themselves and giggled about us we ran up behind them and threw a bucket of water on them.

But B wanted to drag me down further and he could because I was at my weakest. So he went around, searching, searching for something, and he smiled finally, pointing at a man and we followed.

I led that man into an alley. All smiles and hip tilts. And when that man shoved me into the wall with a furious lust I could only imagine, Beyond knocked the man on his ass and started beating him. The man screamed. I relished those cries.

Beyond laughed. An insane, inhuman laugh.

The man coughed up blood, calling us every dirty name in the book, his legs shattered and his face utterly destroyed. He was actually a very handsome man. But not anymore.

Beyond handed me something hard, perhaps a rock, or a brick.

"Do it," he hissed. Like the serpent offering the apple to Eve.

I leaned to the man. Whispering.

"Are you someone's son?" I said.

"Yes," he breathed.

"I am no one's daughter."

And I brought that blunt object down. Like when I was little girl in the snow. My brother Friday had shot a bird in the wing, and I had put it out of its misery.

That's all I was doing really. Putting it out of its misery. Because it was a poor thing. Poor poor things.

Blood on my hands, on my clothes. Little flecks of it on my face and clinging to my eyelashes.

It started to snow.

"C'mon. Let's get going," Beyond picked me up by my elbow and smiled.

He had not changed. It was him. The whole time.

I laughed, an airy-carefree laugh, and we left that dead thing in the snow, and carried on with our own lives.

Like I said, no one gives a shit about you or me. Nobody cared that two killers walked hand in hand in the snow, looking for the entire world like a happy couple going home for lunch.

"Ah, Saturday, Beyond. Please come into the main room. I was just sending Watari to go look for you."

L and Light were separated standing for apart. Actually, Light looked furious, which I'm sure made Beyond "Squee!" on the inside.

"We were just discussing some tactics that me and Light-Kun disagree on, but we'll get to that later. I want to take some time to ask how Saturday is feeling."

The question threw me, but I sighed like it was nothing and answered, "Better than yesterday, I guess."

"I hope that you are. I understand that receiving such shocking news would make one feel quite depressed. I will not hold it against you if you want to retire from the investigation until you feel up to it."

"No really, I'm fine. Besides, there are probably a million families around the world that are going through the same things as me."

"I admire your strength, Saturday," L said after awhile, "Make no mistake as soon as we catch Kira, I will personally find the people that have harmed you and your family."

L shoved some cake into his mouth, and Beyond darted over when he saw there was strawberries in it.

"The question remains. Do you wish to contact the authorities? I doubt you do. You have remained under the radar for many years, have you not?"

"Yes," I nodded, "But that hasn't stopped you, has it?"

"Hmmmm, true. But I make it a point to know the whereabouts of Wammy Children, just to see how they're doing."

"And I appreciate the visits in prison," Beyond mumbled around a piece of cake. L darted in to steal a kiss from him, which was a first. L didn't initiate affection.

"I enjoyed them as well, but back to the original point, I have a feeling that Saturday does want to contact someone. Probably her brother."

"Yes," I nodded, "It's just me and him now. No doubt the killer will target us next."

"How do you figure that?" Light asked, arms still crossed, glaring, "How do you know it wasn't just your sisters? By the way, Tuesday, Thursday, Wednesday? I thought Saturday was a codename."

"It is," I glared, "We all had a codename. The only people alive that knows my real name is my brother, and by extension, probably the killer. I don't have a logical reason for why I know the murderer will target me and my brother, but I know he will."

L was wrong when he said he would find the people responsible for my misery.

No, not people.

A person.

**A/N: And the plot thickens. I think I've bored you all enough with normal life, it's time to get into the serious business. I think **_**someone**_** is a bad influence. And what is this? L is trying to get into B's good graces again? Let's keep our fingers crossed. **

**Also, I would love to receive reviews for how the story is going so far. Love it? Hate it? Questions? Comments? Criticisms? Reviews make me smile, and when I smile, I upload faster. **

**Till next time! **

**CelestialDeth**


	13. Moral and Ethics Over Chess

Hannibal does this annoying thing where I'm asleep and he jumps on my chest and scares the living shit out of me. One of these days, that fucking lizard is going to fall asleep on my face and suffocate me.

But the bastard got me up, at two in the morning no less, and I could see that he wanted to eat. Fuck my life.

I crawled out of my warm bed, growling. I had left Beyond's room when it was obvious him and L were buddy buddy again. He didn't ask me too, I just cleared out because the last thing I wanted was to have both of them burst in making out and me on the bed reading _The Hellbound Heart._ I headed toward the kitchen. Normally, I'd just keep the food in my room, but the second I started getting roaches, I went, "Fuck it," and left his food in the pantry. They could have roaches. Not that I'm saying that the building was dirty, but roaches find ways.

They. Find. Ways.

I sauntered to the floor below mine where the kitchen was, and I came upon an interesting sight.

Light looked about ready to pass out on the counter while L looked like a five year old devouring yet another cake. That man does not sleep. He waits. (Lol, did you see what I did there? I made a funny! I am funny!)

I groaned, wiping the crud from my eyes and went to the cupboard where Hannibal's food was. And then I decided that I was hungry too, so I pulled out some bread to make myself a sandwich.

"Hey guys," I groaned, smiling slightly, putting my bread in the toaster.

"Ah, Saturday, you usually don't wake up so early. Night terrors?"

"Nah, stupid lizard tried to kill me again," I laughed a little, sighing and pulling out the peanut butter.

L analyzed me with curious eyes, and Light could barely keep himself up. Actually, I think he was asleep standing up, but I didn't say anything.

"Has anyone ever told you that you look like a flower blooming while you wake yourself up?" L said out of nowhere.

"Um, no? Actually, that sounded pretty gay. Where the hell did that come from?"

"I was merely making an observation. You know, you're not a morning person. Or a night person. Or a day person."

"You, my friend, are a smart ass."

"Ah well, better than being a dumb ass."

Even Light look startled at that.

I dropped the peanut butter in my shock.

"Whoa….that….that was like…you first bad ass moment, wasn't it?"

"I merely talked down to your level to come up with an insult you can understand."

"…..Aaaaaand that moment is gone. Go to hell."

"Now that we have the usual shouting match out of the way, I wish to discuss something with you." And with that, he shoved a piece of cake into his mouth.

"Can we do that later, when I'm actually wake and I can pretend I'm paying attention?"

"I'm going to ignore what you just said, and get right to it. I wanted to speak with you about this supposed 'fling' you and Beyond have been pursuing."

I decided to play stupid, looking at the toaster to witness my bread getting smoldered into black ashes.

"Seriously, if we can't get simple appliances to work, it's a wonder why people even walk into planes."

"I'm not angry Saturday. Beyond explained everything. I just wanted to confirm his story."

"Oh? So you _do _know that your psychotic boyfriend forced me into a half assed fake relationship where I was subjected to unnecessary touching and getting my face dented in? Well good for you. He's a keeper."

"Yes, he apologized about that by the way."

"Oh, did he?"

"No, I'm just apologizing on his behalf."

"That's nice. Well, is that all you wanted to talk about? Because I have a feeling that if I don't feed Hannibal now, he'll murder me in my sleep."

"No, I'm afraid not. You see, Beyond explained the reasons for your little trysts."

"Well shit. Why do you think we were doing it?"

If looks could kill, I would be scattered in tiny little Saturday pieces.

"…..Really? _Really?_ No fucking way! Ewwwwwwwwwww."

"You two were pretty convincing."

"I thought you were smart! Did the constant beating the shit out of each other NOT clue you in?"

"I assumed it was strange kind of foreplay. Beyond is incredibly violent."

"That's disturbing." I crossed my arms, "Well, why do I need to explain myself? I think YOU two are the ones that need to do the explaining."

And then all of a sudden, Light huffed, like a little girl, and turned the other way.

"He's angry."

"I can tell. The hissy fit was pretty obvious."

Light glared. And I suddenly felt like dying. The hell?

"Well, anyway, you are correct. I do have to explain myself. I have already spoke with B, I think it's only fair that I tell you as well, seeing as you were drag into this."

He took another bite of his cake before continuing.

"Although I admit that it may not be a good reason, I was trying to test my boundaries of the relationship I had with Beyond. I'm not good at this sort of thing; I'm not sure at the proper procedure."

"Lame."

"Secondly, as you very well know, I will pursue every angle to crack this Kira case. So I tried to engage Light into a relationship in hopes that he could confess to me."

"That is a load of wrong."

"It seemed like a good idea at the time."

"Fuck yourself," Light growled.

"Yeah, Light's right. That seems pretty….cruel."

"I assumed that Light agreed to it because he was acting as Kira to confuse my feelings in order to obtain my name."

"Well you should never assume! When you 'assume,' you make an ASS out of YOU and ME." Light snarled.

"In the process, Light figured out I truly did not reciprocate, and his feelings were hurt."

"Try 'heartbroken'."

"How'd he figure it out? If me and Beyond were convincing, how the hell did you manage to fuck up?"

"I refused to have sex with him."

"What? You were already cheating your boyfriend and allowing him to get back at you by molesting me! Why not go whole hog?"

"Well, I had planned to do whatever it took. But when the time came, I couldn't will myself to do it."

"Aww. That's kind of sweet. I guess. I've got to go puke now."

"Goodnight."

"Yeah right. You were worried about Night Terrors? I'm going to have them every day for the rest of my natural born life."

When I reached my room, I pulled out Hannibal's bowl to feed them, and that's when I saw it.

"!"

I darted out of my room, probably scaring Hannibal into an early grave, and I ran down the hallway, bumping into L who was dragging Light behind him.

"What is going on?" L asked hurriedly, "What's wrong?"

"There's….there's…there's…" I shook.

"_What is it?"_

"In….my….room…." I pointed down the wall.

Beyond opened the door to his room and poked his head out, "What's going on? Light-o wet his pants?"

"Fuck yourself."

"Already did, but I'll keep that in mind for later."

"There's…..there's…"

"What is it?"

"Just go and _KILL IT!"_

"I'm in!" Beyond hopped out of his room and dashed towards my room. The rest of us trialed behind, while I unknowingly clung to Light.

"Where is it?" Beyond called from my bedroom.

"It's next to my bed!"

"Oh, you gotta be fucking kidding me!"

There was a whack, and Beyond walked out with my shoe in his hand.

"_You're scared of a fucking spider?"_

"Get that thing away from me!"

I jumped onto Light's back when Beyond waved the shoe with the crushed up arachnid into my face.

It was huge. HUGE!

"Do you have arachnophobia? Because you were pretty bad ass when you weren't acting like a wimpy girl."

"Go shit on a rake!"

[The Next Day]

"I have a favor to ask," L came up to me when the others had left. And quite early too. Things in the investigation had been moving pretty quickly as of late.

"What do you need?" I put my books on the coffee table, trying to ignore the lingering smell of Wedy's cigarettes.

"I would like for you to take Misa and Light on an alleged date for an hour. I'm treating Beyond to a night out."

"Ain't that debonair of you." I smirked.

"He's making me."

"Oh. Alright then. And in return….you owe me a favor."

"A favor?"

"Yes, because the last time I got Misa and Light out of your hair, I caught Beyond slamming you into his head board. I'm not doing this without the insurance that I'm being compensated for my damaged mind."

"I see. What kind of favor would it be then?"

"I don't know. I'll tell you when I need one."

"Only if it's acceptable."

"That's fine. So Light. Ready for someone else to stalk you?"

"I'm thrilled."

"Oh, don't be a jack ass. We'll try to have a semi decent time. Hey, did I tell you that Misa has been teaching herself to play chess? She's getting a little good at it."

That caught his attention.

"Really?"

"Yeah, it's amazing what happens when you actually pay attention to your girlfriend and not cheat on her with another guy who's dating someone else."

"She's not my girlfriend."

"Okay, look. I don't know what your fucking problem is. I'd just be grateful that there's someone in this world that actually wants to be with you. The poor girl worships the ground you walk on, so at least give her some respect."

L tilted his head slightly, peering curiously at me, "When did you get defensive of Amane-San?"

I frowned, "I'm naturally feminist. I get defensive towards all girls. And by the way? What the fuck is up with everyone in this building? Do you seriously all have something against boobs, or what? Thank god for Matsuda. Someone in here needs to be straight."

"I did not realize our preferences offended you," L tilted his head again, thumb in his mouth, "I assure you, it's not intentional. I'm sure someone finds a lot of attractive qualities about you-"

"No, not _me, _I mean other g_irls._ Light, as far as I know, avoids them like the plague. I don't understand what's so wrong about women. Their soft, and sweet, and they've got _really_ nice hair-"

"Are you a lesbian?" Light suddenly asked.

"Does it matter?"

"No, I was just asking-"

"We'll talk in great detail about the finer points of my sexuality, but I'd rather get going to Misa's now. Let's go."

…..

"Look, I wouldn't worry. Even if you used to be Kira, you aren't him now. And I have to tell you Light, either you're a really good actor, or you're genuinely a nice guy. I want to go with the latter, mostly because I actually like you."

He looked surprised at that. Misa was silent, contemplating her next move. We were sitting in a small coffee shop while I watched the two play a moderately interesting game of chess.

"You do?"

"Yeah. I mean, when we first met, I hated your guts. Now I can stand you, even though you're nice. I'm a very good judge of character."

"When we met, did you think I was Kira?"

"Yes," I sipped some of my coffee, "Well, actually, I had a theory that you were either Jesus or a robot. Kira comes in as a pretty close second."

"Are you making fun of me?" Light frowned.

"Damn straight. But don't take it up the ass. I take the piss out on everybody."

"Can you take this seriously? You're pretty much the only one I can talk to about this. If I said something…L…." he flinched, "He'll mostly try to use this conversation as a way to profile me, and I seriously can't take more of his accusations."

He turned back to the chess game he was engaged in with Misa, "Okay. You're move."

She smiled at him expectantly, and concentrated on her next move.

"Well, it IS his job," I half joked, but when I saw his face, I felt bad, "Okay! Okay, I see your point. Accusations suck. But you seriously need to put on your big boy pants, and just ignore it. He's unorthodox, but remember that it was you who agreed to this. Anything to prove your innocence-right?"

"The more he accuses me, the more I believe it, but I don't want to…no no, Misa, you can't move a Bishop there, no, it's fine, think it over," his shoulders sagged, "I don't want to be a killer. I don't want to be Kira. But I keep having these thoughts. I think Kira's justice is right. And I'm scared. If L's right, and I arranged it so that Kira's power comes back to me….." he frowned, "I hope something goes wrong. That my plan doesn't work. I don't want Kira's powers."

"Then consider this," I gestured to ourselves. "Consider how you feel, consider your opinion of yourself. Consider anything. Misa, move your knight, you're queen's open. Remember how you feel now, and if something happens, and your power comes back, then you can decide for yourself whether you want to continue to be Kira."

"What if I can't?" Mumbled Light, "What if I can't choose? What if that power is corrupt, or my desire to create a perfect world overcomes what I feel now and L dies."

"If L dies, B's going to kill you."

"Saturday, please-"

"Well, what do you want me to do? –Oh, nice move Misa. This is on you Light. All I can really say that if you do become Kira again, and kill L, then you're nothing but a dick. A douche bag. A douche bag and a cheater. And that you'd you better prepare of the consequences. L dies, and I'll kill you myself. With my bare hands if I have to."

Misa let out a weird sounding sob and a shriek.

"No, you shouldn't kill Light! Even if my Light was Kira, it won't be his fault! It-it'd be the powers that kill's fault. Don't kill my Light!"

Misa jumped and hugged me, and I sunk into my seat and tried to wiggle out.

"Don't-don't do that. Full body hugs are not my thing," I muttered, face red with a bright blush.

"You'd be hypocrite if you killed me," Light gazed at me worriedly.

"I guess. But killing people that kill is hypocrisy. I don't believe in death row."

"Really?" Light looked at me as if the idea was ridiculous, "You don't think criminals deserve to be punished?"

"Oh god no. I just don't believe in death row. Who are we to judge? We're only human. That's God's job."

"You're catholic?"

"Well, y'know. You gotta believe in something. The whole heaven/hell thing is appealing. At least you go somewhere kinda scary to think that there's nothing after. But back to my original point. I believe everyone deserves a shot at redemption. It's the justice system that swallows."

"But that doesn't change the fact that the world is full of rotten people."

"No shit. I've been to middle school. I know people suck. But no one deserves death. No one is born bad."

"Some people can't be saved."

"Well, let's use an example. Keep this in mind: I'm in a criminal."

Both of them did a double take.

"You-you're a criminal?"

"Correct, Mr. and Mrs. Potential Serial Killer. I've been to prison."

"What did you do?" Light gritted his teeth.

I contemplated telling him, figured it would get me no brownie points but I didn't give a shit anyway, and muttered, "Manslaughter."

Misa's jaw dropped. Drama Queens-the both of them.

"Oh, be quiet. It was strictly self defense. Not a day goes by that I don't regret it."

"Regret getting caught."

"Okay, no what? Fuck you. I paid my dues. I'm the one that has to live with this. I wish I didn't do it, but it happened and that's the way it is. I can't change my actions."

"What happened?"

"She attacked me, I retaliated. That's all there is too it really. Well, I'm done arguing. Talking my logic to you is like talking self esteem into a fat chick. Let's go. We've been gone long enough. "

…

I passed L's room and there was enough noise to convince me that their 'hour' wasn't over yet. I walked away and then I heard, "OW! WHAT THE FUCK! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

Beyond.

My interest was caught, and I peered past the door and discovered something…..fucking A.

L and B were play fighting…or something like that. Well, L just pretty much through Beyond on the floor and crawled on top of him.

"LAWLI! GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME! LAWLI!

And L was just laughing his ass off.

Beyond pushed him off and jumped on him. And then I realized how horrendously SHORT Beyond was compared to L. And they started spinning around in circles while Beyond swore and L just laughed.

And when Beyond fell on the bed and L jumped on top of him while Beyond just screamed, "NO! NO! _NO! NO!"_

I burst out laughing. Both of them looked at me and Beyond's eye's grew as big as dinner plates. And L smirked.

I couldn't seem to stop laughing. It was just so funny. L was actually an expert bedroom attacker and Beyond has submissive issues, and he was short. Short!

"What the fuck are you looking at you stupid bitch?" Beyond hissed.

"Oh, it's on," I rolled up my jacket sleeves and dived onto the bed with them.

Beyond tried to tickle me, but he seemed to forget that we both came from the same house. I'm not a dumbass. I knew all the moves.

Pretty soon, we were laughing so hard our insides hurt, and in the middle of it, Misa heard us and jumped in with us. We broke a coffee table in the process. And Light stood in the door way, pretending we were all idiots, but a ghost of a smirk was painted on his face as he shook his head.

You know, I'm pretty sure somewhere in the beginning of this story, I mentioned something about the point of life is to live. I don't really remember when I came up with the revelation. Maybe when L first contacted me, when I thought I was going to die while B tortured me, or when I was in a farce relationship with Beyond and I made out with a cute French girl.

Nah, I'd like to think I came up with that theory here. Lying in bed with the few people I can actually stand to be around, laughing after a full out tickle war, drifting to sleep with Everclear playing somewhere, and forgetting about tomorrow.


End file.
